Dealing with emotions

Some individuals will walk through a spiritual path. There, they will learn about their own “weaknesses.” That is the typical label used to recognize those aspects which need “improvement.”
Others however, feel alright as they are. They are pretty sure it is others who cause problems and in turn make them feel upset, mad, angry, unhappy, etc. These people only react to the stimuli. Thus, a step forward in inner knowledge will be to realize that those emotions are within and triggered from without.

Those inner emotions have been labeled with a negative connotation: They are called sins, vices, etc.
The “spiritual game” consists on how to get rid of those “bad traits” and install the good ones, so we could “improve.”
On that end, many inventions have been made. There are confessions of sins, yoga with God, penances, positive thought, etc. Nevertheless, nothing has a lasting effect.

Why is that?
Emotions need to be expressed. We cannot get rid of them by DOING something.
A sad person cannot become truly happy by applying some positive thoughts.
A person feeling guilt and shame, will not be able to be free from those emotions by confessing them.

The typical stereotype of many “spiritual” individuals is: Reject those traits which are considered negative and only allow those things considered positive.

Instead, we may need to learn to express all emotions. Emotions are like water streams, they will run its own curse; however, we do not allow them to fully express, thus; we stop the flow and let those emotions stagnate in ourselves. That is what is known as a trauma.

Obviously, the full expression of some emotions will be detrimental to some members of society. If I feel angry, it will be detrimental to hit someone to express it. However, I could hit a punching bag instead, to my heart desire.
I could express sadness in the privacy of my bedroom and so other emotions as well, once I am AWARE of them. Once they are expressed, the water stream is gone. Just do not use your mind to bring that stream back.
We can feel guilt. Let it go by forgiving yourself, otherwise it will stagnate as self punishment, even though we may not be aware, it remains in the unconscious.

Children will use this principle of letting go. They do not reject or repress emotions. Those are fully expressed and gone. As grown ups become more complex and rigid, there is a need to create an outlet for them.

Although, the above may not be considered appropriate by some, all I have to say is that we cannot interfere with emotions as we see fit. That is utopia, and that has been mainstream teaching due to the mentality of “black or white” morality. A repressed emotion will be detrimental for our well being.

Life uses all emotional energies to express through us. Light cannot exist without the possibility for darkness. To know our best means to equally know our worst. That sort of knowing is experiential, it comes through observation, awareness.

With emotions, express them and once expressed, let them go. Emotional healing means to let go.

We live life just to go away. The candle is lit just to be extinguished. Emotions are meant to pass by, once they arrive.
Observe the game to play it well.

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One comment

  1. Gayathri

    True. I have experimented with this idea of letting the emotions express themselves by not repressing them. Sometimes i was quite depressed to see my level of thoughts/ emotions, but i knew that that was what i was at that moment. But it also feels good to accept myself as I really am and to let the transformation to take place at its own pace without forcing the self to change and to pretend to be some one which i am really not. This attitude enables me to understand and accept others too as they really are, at least, it paves the way to accept others in due course. 🙂
    Thanks brother for the article.

    Like

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