…And just when I thought that to be tough is all there is in Life, I found that toughness is the biggest vulnerability someone could have.
When there is no awareness, we could be taught to put up an image in front of the world just to protect our own pettiness.
It is the typical “office world” mentality of “marketing ourselves” to boast about our strengths and to “fake it until we make it.”
That is the world of pressuring ourselves to “succeed.”
Nothing wrong with that world.
Nevertheless, in Life in our relationships with people it is of great importance to show who we are.
A relationship grows in depth as we take off our layers of protection, as we stripe our image and show our vulnerabilities… At that point we are not an ideal anymore, a prototype for everyone to follow…
There is no need to make a list of our own vulnerabilities and to “practice” those in front of loved ones. We just need to allow ourselves to be.
Censorship and rejection could be experienced, and that is fine. We are not supposed to be like everyone else.
That is the first point in self-awareness: Totally acceptance of ourselves; our shadow and our light.
If we have not reached that point, if there is not acceptance, then our interaction with ourselves and others will be a faked one. There will not be fulfillment experienced in relationships as we cannot be ourselves.
When we display our vulnerabilities in awareness, we could know others. For those will be triggers for others to react in judgment, censorship or advice. In turn, that will give us the chance to test our “strength,” meaning our emptiness of “I.”
Without awareness, to display our vulnerabilities will be a source of pain and suffering, for we will feel hurt. That trauma will need to be healed.
The image of the “tough guy” is in vogue. That “toughness” is just meant to conceal the fear of being just who we are. To be tough, we need to set aside our true feelings and with that the opportunity to experience living from the heart.
Vulnerabilities will dissolve in relationship with others, but only for the one who is aware. For the one who is not, it will be the source of belittlement and the need to work on his “image” by building a mental layer of shielding armor.
Emotionally, when our heart is vulnerable, when it is trusting and open, it may get hurt and that is the opportunity to heal through our accumulated strength. It is the perfect chance to see how far we have gone.
If that same heart is tough, hard and closed… not trusting anything…it may not get hurt, because it is already in pain. That is another paradox of Life.
For that closed heart, to live is a fearful experience and to close itself into a small box just to feel safe, is the extent of its “toughness.”
To open our heart despite the possibility of being hurt is an act of courage, and act of affirming the intrinsic necessity to feel Life…and at the same time; the path to experience no-self.
Pain is not to be feared, but transformed. 🙂
“Rich is a very proud individual. He is very arrogant.”
That is a judgment.
In my mind from now on, Rich is equivalent to arrogant and proud.
In my heart, when I see Rich I will have developed “antibodies” towards him.
“Here is the proud and arrogant individual.” Those words are not thought, they are “unconscious” but our emotions will show exactly what we “think,” or rather feel.
In my inner observation, my pristine feelings will be colored by a heavy sensation, which will add up to the cloudy and foggy heaviness of interpreting and judging the participation of “others” in my life.
“Carl insinuated that I am dumb.”
“Rebecca didn’t show respect for me.”
All of those words bring certain quality of feelings, which accumulate in our beings.
At the end of the day, that becomes the way we perceive the world.
“This world is full of arrogant people. We cannot trust them because it may be a hurtful interaction.”
“I interpreted that he had ulterior motives.”
Suspicion appears and with that a new attitude towards life: “I am afraid. Everyone wants something from me.”
That is why it is said, that what is outside is inside; however as our perception refines, we could observe that there is no difference between the outside and the inside.
Do you perceive hate in the environment that you are in?
OK. It will go away if you become an open, empty door. Otherwise, it will be trapped in you.
Because the “I” will have an exact fit for that emotion, if that “I” is made from the same “material.”
Jealousy attracts jealousy. We are all one. The mirror of the world is showing “me” though others. Rather than thanking that “other” for the lesson, we crucify that “other” to protect the always innocent “me.”
Any worthwhile spirituality out there will go into this with different words.
If you are empty, you will not get trapped with a particular emotion or sensation. It will go through you.
If you recognize that sensation or emotion as “good or bad” automatically, you will be trapped in it.
Your moral values have done the judgment.
What do you mean by trapped?
John insulted Sue in a moment of desperation.
Sue accepted the words from John and identified with them. Those words were against Sue’s own image. That was an insult!
Sue reacted and insulted John back.
The back and forward shows the distress of 2 egos hoping to win the war.
Bothe egos are trapped into each other, until the next match.
John will say to his friends: “ Sue is such an …”
Sue will use a similar word to describe John to her friends.
The label used is the tool needed to gain support, to be “right.”
“John is such an idiot.”
Stupidity becomes a synonym with the label, John.
The cloudy, foggy sensation invades our pristine feelings and little by little, a wall is built to protect what we perceive to be “Me.” An Armor is born.
The armor is built through Life experiences of protecting that “I.”
One of the most emotional painful experiences a Life walker could feel, is when he is ready to take the armor off. That takes guts, courage and lots of patience.
That is the process of openness into trusting Life again.
For those who are reading these sharings, the question may arrive: Are these things being shared by Avyakt7 true ? 🙂
If someone is tinkering in that question, that means that this person does not recognize something through his own experience. In other words, that person is a great material for following beliefs and hand-me-down ideas from whomever.
That person is still looking for someone to tell him what he has to do and believe in life.
We could have a Divine experience, but that does not mean that we have an insight as to who we are.
We could have a divine experience, but that does not mean that we have what it takes to discover our own mental obstacles, which are impeding a fulfilled life.
We could join or follow a belief system, but that does not mean that our consciousness has opened to a different level.
We could believe that spirituality is another subject to learn, just like mathematics, and if “I” read a lot of self-help books and listen to world-class gurus, if “I” study a lot.. then “wisdom” will be pouring through our skin pores… effectively changing “normal” sweat into “holy water”… 🙂
Unless our awareness, our consciousness opens up to integrate our being with everything else, we cannot live a fulfilled life.
Take the above as Avyakt7’s belief if you would, but those who somehow recognize that statement in their own lives, will know.
That is what wisdom is: Just recognition.
That recognition opens up as our awareness opens. Our awareness could open as we do not reject experiences in life, but as we learn to accept, to integrate without thinking about it.
Many times some individuals are basically waiting for the “key word” to be spouted so they believe in something. Without that “key word” nothing makes sense to them.
For example, when Avyakt7 refers to the Totality; some may call it as “Drama,” others may call that as “Universe,” or “Cosmos,” or “Nature” or “Tao” or even God… see that in Spirituality labels are not definitions or concepts, but words are merely referential for someone to RECOGNIZE that in his own experience.
A belief system is a closed armor, which does not allow for our consciousness to open up and discover so we know through our own recognition, but rather a belief system puts everything in “easy” concepts for the follower, so he does not get “confused.”
A concept is not the thing or the being. A concept is just mental “clothing” which will not allow us to perceive things naked, but that clothing around the thing, will develop our belief in a particular way.
“It is only this, but it cannot be that.”
Part of growing in life is to open up that armor, and being able to feel things without beliefs, concepts or ideas for the first time.
Oh… what a joy! 🙂