For many seekers, to be unmovable and stoic in the presence of hardship is a sign of “improvement.” Seekers may copy this behavior without seeing the inner lie.
Seekers do not realize that any natural change has a process. It is not a matter of forcing a behavior to copy a saint, a guru or an illuminated one. In society, “I” may appear to be “improving” if my behavior is impervious to misfortune but in Life, there is a consequence for that lack of inner honesty.
The idea of fighting to get what “I” want in Life or to enforce that which “I” believe is worthwhile based on my conditioning, is pursued as a value in Life.
In our society, if something comes which is not what “I” want, that is to be rejected. Fought against.
Life is like an Ocean. It has waves moving towards the shore in different directions. Some days, there is a high tide. How do I get into the Ocean to swim?
I can walk towards it stoically, without reaction, as the waves may act as whips inflicting pain. “I must put up with that pain. I will get to the end soon.” We may think. For many, that is their extent of “spirituality.” It is about cheering someone up with pretty words through hard times.
Others, may dive underneath the visible waves. They are not “fighting like a man,” they are not “being visible” but they can accomplish the same purpose, to be able to swim.
Nevertheless, this person is separated from what IS. This person cannot relax. This person is in the lookout for the next wave. Be like a cat: Vigilant but relaxed. That is an art in itself.
However, integration with “what IS” is not there. That is, accept what IS. Become part of it.
Have you noticed that many times there are people who like and enjoy to DO things that we don’t?
How do you behave if you happen to be in the same environment? Many will reject what IS. We can walk out, we can walk away but what truly matters is if there is a rejection inside us.
A Life walker learns that differences are meant to be truly appreciated and then integrated.
Integration takes inner openness, acceptance. It may be expressed as : “I will give it a shot.”
Life is seen as a compilation of experiences. There is no label of rejection inside us.
Even death is accepted with integration. It is only another experience.
Do we “practice” integration with Life?
NO. Life will teach us when we are ready.
How do we become ready?
By BEING CONSCIOUS of living Life. Otherwise, we are confined to ideas, ideals, wishes, expectations, conditioning. That is dreaming.
It is a wonder that we dream constantly even though we believe to be awake.
As obvious as this sounds, we continually neglect that. We have ideas of what should be, what is right, what is better for others. Comparisons are incessant and with that a sensation that will not allow us to feel fulfillment in Life.
Most everyone wants to be “someone” in Life: Well known, powerful, influential. However, that is not Life. That is society. In Life, we already ARE. In society, we continually need to BECOME someone else, we call that with a pretty label: “better” we say.
Am I saying to be a “nobody,” not to have goals in “Life”?
No. Every Life is a unique experience. Riches may be combined with ill health. Power with impotence. Influence combined with a lousy relationship, it is a bag of mixed goodies!
How can there be happiness then?
It just depends on what we focus on. Some “spiritual” people like to call this as “positive thinking.” But that could be a bunch of “positive self-inflicted lies.”
What I focus on, is not thinking. It is that which I enjoy, that which I take great pleasure, that which makes my day, and of course; that will change, thus there is no space for the “same old thing.”
It is in this focus how appreciation of that which I am able to do NOW, that which I have NOW becomes my source of fulfillment. When it is time for that to change, I will be able to shift to newness, for in appreciation of now, there is space for a new tomorrow. It may not be as I thought of, or as I wished this newness should be or as I expected it; but it is certain that this new change will bring newness and with that a new source of fulfillment as long as my focus is on the art of appreciation.
In our society, we are taught to think too much, thus there is no space for unrehearsed appreciation. We don’t have to have all the answers before making a move, we just need to feel if that change is where Life will take me and trust it.
Trust is not a matter of having faith in some power above us. It is a matter of acceptance of Life as it comes to us.
Acceptance is one of the hardest things to BE, when we are told to fight for everything in Life. When we ARE in that consciousness of fighting, we are taught to “practice” acceptance when there is no way out.
What a joke.
“Normal” consciousness can only perceive the physical aspect of sex.
“Normal” people will express sexuality mostly based on their lower energetic levels (Chakras.) That expression is raw, only concerned with the satisfaction of the sexual organs by getting rid of the “itch” of their own life force. That force lacks regulation to permit closeness and blissful enjoyment. It reaches a quick peak and explodes. Pornography is a good example: Protagonists are limited to the sexual organs. That “making love” is mixed with profanity, hitting the partner and even inflicting pain. That is fashionable, “normal” nowadays. There is nothing to condemn or to preach about. It only shows our collective consciousness, who we ARE. An “orgasm” becomes a power play. Unconscious shame and guilt of feeling pleasure, is masked in that act.
When the energetic expression is based on the heart (upper chakras,) sexuality has a different meaning. It is a slow dance. There is no goal just like in dancing. It is the dance of 2 beings becoming one.
“Teachers” will teach “methods” to slow down. They will give Do’s and Don’ts. The outcome is dishonest individuals, copycats who are hiding who they really ARE. If you are a “normal” individual you cannot pretend to be a heart focused person. Your energy is not there, no matter how many “methods” or “techniques” someone may follow.
If you are a “normal” person looking to experience something “great,” “better” or different, you are not acknowledging who you ARE.
When we know who we ARE, we can change. It is natural to change. Our society will teach us to DO things to make a fake change without spending time in our self-understanding.
For our society to have degrees and certifications in sexuality and spirituality is important to “know” and to “teach” others. If your higher chakras are not open, of what good your information, your knowledge is? You ARE NOT who you pretend to BE. That information will not help you to BE there. Only to DO things to look like you are there.
Do you want to be a great lover? Do you want the “secrets,” the “techniques”? No need to register for a class. Here it is:
Learn to love yourself. Start with your own body. That is very difficult when we have taboos and conditionings, so; the task is to learn about ourselves to decipher our own maze. That is where sexuality and spirituality begin in a holy marriage.
When we love ourselves, we can love another. Without loving ourselves first, there is no chance to share love with another. It will be fake. Sooner or later our true needy, traumatized self will come out.
Thus, human sexuality is the manifestation of who we ARE.
Observe the duality within your body. Your penis and your anus are sources of great pleasure but at the same time, it is a “normal” source of a feeling of disgust, for urination and defecation are also part of their function. A conditioning that “straight males do not mess with their anus” is there. Could you accept your whole body? Not mentally or verbally, but it has to be a change in BEING.
Do you love your own body? Do you touch yourself with care as to experience the pleasurable sensations that your body is capable of? Do you feel ashamed or guilty? Those feelings cannot go away with a simple understanding that our body is “good.” We have to go deeper emotionally. That is the journey.
Sexuality and Spirituality are intimately related. When taboos are no longer there, when our little conditionings are dissolved, we are free, open. Sexuality will show us our hang ups, our lack of openness, our fears… BUT, we don’t start with talks and techniques to touch ourselves or our partners “better.” We start with acknowledging who we ARE NOW and by discovering our emotional barriers.
Human sexuality is truly a gift to enjoy in our corporeal experience. That capacity of enjoyment varies among human beings: For some is none to negative. For others is greater to outstanding. That is the range of experiences. But for very few, it is a communion with the Universe. That is the most sacred act. Worthy of being depicted in a holy temple.
Will be on vacation until July 5th.
What we ARE is the flavor that will be transmitted to others. What we DO does not bring flavor when our actions do not match who we ARE.
For most, sexuality is about physical attraction or an opportunity. These individuals usually are not aware of energies. That is fine. For others sexuality is an expression and the physical goes along with emotional closeness, for there is energetical compatibility. That is fine too.
Let me illustrate: Most “normal” individuals will eat junk food in a heartbeat. These are not aware of the consequences that this will bring later on, but they enjoy the moment. Enjoyment is good! Junk food is many times, emotional food. Others who are aware of natural food and the benefits of it, may not eat junk food. Junk food is naturally tasteless for them. They enjoy “healthy” food! Similarly, some may sleep with anyone in the name of “practicing” Tantra. Energetically junk food is OK for them. Others, may be more picky. All is good, according to our consciousness. But, if we crave junk food but repress it in the name of eating healthy, we may have created a problem for ourselves. Change from junk into healthy without repression, does not come solely through intellectual understanding. There has to be change of consciousness, otherwise; our repression will be hidden and growing.
Male ejaculation has become a “problem” nowadays, due to information shared by “masters.” We hear: Avoid ejaculation at all costs, that drains your energy. “Techniques” are sold for that, etc. If your BEING is not ready for that, it will be all about repression. Sex will not be enjoyable as a guilt trip is assured, if a “mistake” happens. A “master” is not made out of “practice” alone. If there was only “practice” and “Technique” rest assured, that individual is not a “master.”
It is very important to know where we ARE at a particular point in time. To look at ourselves and observe if we are repressing or indulging to the point of draining ourselves. If we are in the middle, know that this “middle” will change in time. It is a game of balance. To gain that sense of balance, is very important in Life.
The mind likes to ask questions such as: How many times is it OK to ejaculate per month?
Please forget about that. Learn to feel. If you are aware of how you feel, you will know. “Listen to your body.” If we depleted our energy, there are visible consequences. Using “scientific help” will deplete more what we have left. Naturally, celibacy is helpful at that time to regenerate our energy.
We have made sexuality into a problem. Rather, look at ways to change, to become less rigid about ideas of what “should be.” As we learn to accept ourselves and love ourselves starting from our bodies and the appreciation of the different feelings/sensations that our bodies are capable of, we could be ready to experience our own meaning of human sexuality. It is our own path after all.
Some individuals have the capacity to enjoy sex tremendously. Others do not. Once we realize that Life offers the whole range of experiences, then our labels of “good, bad, right , wrong” will be left aside. All it is needed from us at every moment, is to be completely honest with ourselves. This holds true with sexuality as with other aspects of Life.
We may need to remember that Life changes and so do we. It is natural. Only our minds will bind us to the way we were a few months ago. It is in that acceptance of change how a relationship could be built. Nevertheless, most are not ready for that. Most want certainty, security. These individuals demand that someone does not change throughout their lives… without a doubt, love cannot grow in that.
Love grows in uncertainty. That is the flavor of BEING.
Even today, there is a complete misunderstanding of human sexuality.
There is very little conscious experience of male sexuality. This time, I will share in a series of articles.
What makes me an “expert”?
I had the “normal” consciousness at one time in my Life. Now, it is different. Out of that change of consciousness there are many other natural changes including a different perception, experience and understanding of sexuality. Throughout reading the many articles of this blog, many will realize what I am pointing out. It seems as if 2 different people were writing here, although; it was just “me.”
In our society there is a reaction towards male energy. That reaction has taken the collective consciousness to believe that female energy is what we need at this time. The typical misunderstanding has placed a woman as the centerpiece on some religions and even “Tantra” teachings today. Please be aware that female energy is genderless. A male could have a predominant female energy as well as a female, male energy. Misunderstanding upon misunderstanding based on “research” of “normal” typical individuals is not the basis of the belief that human sexuality is like that. There is more to it.
A woman cannot understand the experience of a male. Similarly the opposite. Between males (whether predominantly female or male energy,) there is an enormous range of experiences that are possible.
Nevertheless, a different type of sexuality beyond the “normal” kind based on the harmonious exchange of energy of 2 different poles (male/female) happens when human consciousness changes. When we ARE ready.
Without this inner change, we are left with “techniques” and “rituals,” this is the game of pretending to be something that we ARE not. Spirituality and Sexuality are based on consciousness. Conscious awareness of energy. However, most are stuck in the physical attributes.
Therefore, it only makes sense to acknowledge who we ARE at this time, to value who we ARE at this time, to love who we ARE at this time, for a natural change to occur, free of traumatic experiences.
Our society sells performance and to be “better” all the time, without realizing that they are sending the message that as we ARE, we ARE not enough. This game of a donkey striving to reach the invisible carrot does not allow us to enjoy that which IS, right NOW… before it changes naturally.
The above is the foundation for Tantra. Without it, we are just dealing with mind games, as “teachers” are merely taking advantage of human weaknesses by merely promoting to indulge in sex, to a sexually repressed and spiritually unfulfilled individual. That game could be dangerous.
Sexuality is energy. It is that type of energy the one capable of bringing different types of experiences to individuals. That energy flows naturally from the pelvic region to the forehead, however; most “normal” individuals are completely unaware of this for their subtle “pipes” (nadis) are not “clean” enough. When this energy flows, the state of elation and bliss could be maintained longer which translates to a fulfilled, revitalizing act. However, for most that upward path is “clogged up” as a pipe which does not allow for water to flow upwards. The consequence is the explosion of that pressure on the pelvic region. That is what is known as “normal” for most. The label used is “orgasm.”
I want to clean my “pipes.” How to DO it? What is the “technique”?
If you are asking those questions, there is no understanding of what I conveyed above.
Only sharing for the common good.
We shall continue….
When we sleep at night, who are we?
Are we conscious of BEING? No? Where are We?
We could say “logically” that we are the body which is resting on the bed. But, experientially; we are not. Logically that is a “truth,” but experientially is a falsehood.
We ARE but we ARE NOT. That is the totality. The illogical “reality” which our conditioning is unable to make us understand.
When we ARE, when we awaken from sleep, we do not realize how the environment affects our disposition. The collective consciousness is affected, but yet, we believe that we are separated from all of that.
Even though awake, we are asleep.
Some are affected by a profound lethargy due to their efforts to keep the “same old thing.” Life changes around but yet, the way we meet those changes is with the same “old tricks” from the past. In that conditioning, we cannot meet the “now.”
Once a change is visible as it screams in front of our faces, we meet that change with resistance, comparing what it used to be with what IS.
In our “logical” society we have learned that if A is different than B, then B cannot be ever he same as A.
In Life, both are the same; for the recognition of A as the opposite of B, means that both are naturally inseparable, as a head follows a body. Due to our “efforts” to fight by keeping the head but not the body, we kill the whole thing in the name of some belief. We only see a different form, and label it to make a conceptual difference, but we do not see the substance.
“I am this, not that.” Infantile perception. Superficial observation.
In Life “opposites” are together. That is the totality in the world of duality.
What was said in this article, cannot be “explained” logically or through a “spiritual” course without lying and getting into logical “loopholes.”
Who are we?
What we ARE and what we ARE not. That wholeness is an experience, not an intellectual understanding.
When we ARE, we are afraid of what we ARE NOT.
When we ARE NOT, fear is not.
As long as we ARE, there will be fear.
Fear is the opposite of love. So in the duality of Life, both are like a body with a head.
Some may say: Hate is the opposite of love not fear! I am not talking about a dictionary word here. The game of antonyms. Look inside you! FEAR is there as the cause. The siblings are hate, greed, attachment, add any other “bad” word here…
Yet, Love is experienced when we ARE NOT while WE ARE. That is to be AWAKE by integrating the opposites. That was labeled as “egoless” by some misunderstood religious book, beliefs, etc.
However, we are busy rejecting fear with its siblings and praising love. That we call “spiritual,” “moral,” etc.
By denying what IS, we live in a made-up world of concepts and illusions; truly sleeping while walking around.
Observe a flying bird. There is a time for flapping the wings and a time to glide.
There is a variation known as bounding flight.
For a bird those movements are natural, flapping and gliding are together. A circumstance will drive the timing for change, but in general; gliding takes way longer than flapping.
Humans believe that fighting to get what “I want” is a necessary never ending flight. That sort of flapping is tiresome, it is debilitating. Humans do not know how to glide for they fear to give up control.
How could I go faster if I am gliding?
How could I achieve if I take it easy?
When the wind blows against his flying direction, a human will strongly “fight” and swear to “never give up.” That sort of heroic immolation, is only a childish silly situation.
Flapping and gliding in Life go hand in hand. Going with the wind of Life rather than against it, is the art of unity, vitality and preservation.
The mind will ask: How do I know when it is the right moment to glide?
The answer is obvious. Ask the bird.
No answer? Then watch. Observe. Empty your beliefs and conditionings. Shut down the questions.
What is worthwhile in Life to learn, cannot be learned through the mind.
The mind knows about “success.” It knows about “failure.”
Life is without that duality for to glide, is not the opposite of flapping. Those are one. Timing for flapping or gliding is not something to learn, but to feel.
Feeling is something that most humans have not been trained to “do.” Thus, they need to ask questions, to make sure, to “get it right,” “to get ahead,” to be “successful,” “to be saved.”
The ideals become more important than feeling. But without feeling, there is no living.