Thank you for your very good question!
Brahmin diet gives you the “do not consume” items. Those things are meat of any kind, eggs, garlic, onions, tobacco, alcohol and any non prescribed drugs. The rest you may “indulge.”
However, that “space” of things which you can eat, is open for you to decide.
As far as myself, I do not eat spicy food, cheese, processed sugars, white rice, flours and I do not drink coffee. That pretty much leaves BK sugary tolis out of the picture. My aim is Sattvic food as much as possible.
Also, I am not fond on eating food that it is cooked by others but myself. I will accept from someone who I feel is in a similar effort making stage than mine.
When it comes to bhog there are 2 schools of thought: ” Take everything that Baba offers” or “Do not take everything and pick what you feel will agree with you.” I go for the later. If you do not feel that what is being offered to Baba is something that you would like to eat, do not feel compelled to eat it. Just say thank you and take Drishti.
When I go to Madhuban or any other BK center; I may have to make some exceptions in my diet, but still I will eat lots of fruits and drink lots of juices as much as possible.
Even though I have requested in an “unofficial” way to have a BK seminar on combining food items properly and trying raw foods as well, here in the USA,( Which I feel is very healthy and wholesome) that request hasn’t been followed up.
Therefore, if you have any knowledge about combining food items properly and eating them at their proper time, it would appreciated if you share it.
What you eat affects your mind and even though that is something that BapDada has mentioned, still we do not seem to “get it.”
Thank you for your question!
There is a saying: “As the food so the mind.”
In my experience, food is extremely important in maintaining a good stage. Spiritually speaking, the vibrations are important. Baba usually mentions that “if we eat food cooked by a yogi, our stage will become good.” Also, “if we cook our food while in yoga, that food will give us power.”
In my case, I am extremely picky as to what I eat as well as if I have to accept food from another BK. I cook my own food and even though I am not a “cook” by any means, I manage to do it because I know it is important.
When I first started in gyan, My ex-mother in law liked to cook. She would accommodate my needs, she was celibate and she was a good cook! I asked around if I shouldn’t accept her food anymore.
The reply I received from Baba’s instruments was that I should accept it (to avoid confrontations and knowing that I was “new” in gyan.) However, back in my mind, I wanted to “do everything” from the beginning; and “asked Baba for His help.” 🙂
I told my ex-mother in law that in my new faith, I needed to prepare my own food but that I could accept fruits, if she had some.
To my surprise, she was very accepting and did not feel offended. Magic!
With that background information, I think that you could see my viewpoint.
Thank you for your question.
I do not have the experience of having children, but I have the experience of having dealt with anger /irritation and having dealt with children at the elementary school system level.
First, let me be clear that we will not see the point on changing unless we are aware of the benefits of that change; not at the intellectual level, but by having experienced it beforehand. For me , I was aware that anger changed my face factions and that I became hurtful to the self and others around me. Anger damages the way we feel and it is violence. The extension of that anger usually manifests as violence towards others (in your case, may be your children.) The issue is not your children, as you may be aware, they are just “triggers,” buttons to be pushed, so you can react. We feel “at ease” to show our true self with those who we have familiarity. Once there is this realization that angers hurts and that “I feel anger” without trying to hide it, then we are ready to deal with it.
According to your level of awareness you may take different steps. In my case, I started from the beginning. I had to improve my diet. BKs many times do not realize how important a good wholesome diet is and how your mind will be changed just by changing your diet and how important, extremely important is to cook it yourself. It is an artificial type of change for we modify the hormones and chemical substances inside the body, but that is enough to make us see a change, to make us “aware” of change. As you probably know: No garlic, no onions, no meat, no tamo (impure) food and if you eat in a “satvic” way, even better. No Indian spices allowed. Eat simple food, natural food items, cook them to the minimum. Learn to mix food items. Be conscious while you are eating.
That is the first step.
The second step is your meditation/yoga/remembrance. There is a need to have your own space, being secluded, gone, so you can enjoy/experience feeling the self. That is why for many that scape is at Amrit Vela time. It will take some time, but it has to be practiced. Your change in diet will change your openness to spiritual vibes, if naturally you do not have it, as it was my case. If you have experienced that “peace” you just remember that experience and carry that experience with you at all times, being aware of it. Anything that will take you away from that peace is a trigger, a button that pushes you. There is a need to be aware of those “buttons” that push you into anger mode.
The key is to be aware of your state of mind at every moment as a practice and to look at things that are happening to you as if you were watching TV. You are there but it is a TV program happening. This experience creates a space between you and the Drama. That space is “artificial” as well but just made so your awareness is there. Eventually, it is a “sanskara,” a trait that is gained through sheer practice of being aware of yourself.
In this practice you can consider your children with the same consideration that you have towards your own parents, your boss at work or someone else that you “respect.” Play that role, so your children will not be “your children anymore.” See how your dealing with them has changed. This is what Baba refers to as changing your “vision.” That vision changes your attitude towards your children and that attitude makes an impact on those around you.
Last “trick.” Anger and sex lust are related as violence. Celibacy when practiced without repression automatically will drop your anger mode.
The BK maryadas are all related and the deeper those maryadas are part of your life, the greater will be the opportunity to be aware of the self. Notice that I am not saying to “change the self.” Just to be aware of it, for that awareness in itself means change. If you are not aware, there could not be any change, transformation possible. There will only be “reaction” towards the environment and according to your taught traditions.
Anger is frustration. Make a point not to raise your voice or to become emotional. Just let the Drama unfold the next scene of life and then” count til 20 before doing anything…” 🙂 Then you will realize that there is no need to become angry, for whatever has been done, it is done and anger will not change things in a positive way but will rather cause further sorrow.
Last but no least… always have time for your own enjoyment. Do not pack the day with activities so you are “rushed” to do things. Having ample space /time is essential to be aware of what is going on; otherwise, we are not living but being robots of destiny. All the best!
PS: I recommend this link as well.