AWARENESS is not something to practice. It is something to be aware of…
How to make sense of that sentence? We heard so much about being AWARE, but all we have are beliefs, interpretations, concepts, information of what that is thus, useless stuff for self-realization.
“Useless” is the right word. It has to be experiential to be able to understand, to know.
Here is an “exercise.” It is not something to “practice.” It is something to fully experience. If you cannot fully experience it, if you cannot let yourself go, then repeat it again.
Find a full size mirror, those that will allow you to observe most of your physical body.
If you are fully clothed, you will probably be alright. The conditioning is to look at the clothes to see if they are wrinkled, if they match, if they look good on you, etc.
Now, take your clothes off. Observe your body and your face fully while doing this “exercise.” Did you notice your tummy? The size of your sexual organs? The color of your skin? The wrinkles in your face?
Did you notice how you feel while observing those elements of your body?
AWARENESS resides in that.
Did you feel shame? Did you blush and feel embarrassed?
In that moment, that is who YOU are.
Isn’t it silly to get embarrassed by looking at your own body?
That is where the hang up resides. Look for the root of it.
Did you like your body?
That is sick! You are supposed to like someone else’s body but not your own. Perhaps you have some homosexual issues… huh?
That’s it! You found another trauma. Go to the root of it. A body is a body. There is beauty in the body. Appreciate it. Enjoy the moment.
Want to go on with the exercise?
OK. Caress your face while looking at the mirror. What do you feel? Caress your chest. What do you feel? Caress your sexual organs. What do you feel?
Masturbation is “bad”! I shouldn’t touch myself! Do you recognize that thought? What is the difference between touching your face and your sexual organs? Find the beliefs, the taboos. Observe how you feel. Be aware of it.
How could you enjoy pleasure with all of those hang ups, taboos and beliefs in morality and decency?
You cannot. Your mind will not allow you. It is not the ACTION what makes something “sinful.” It is what you feel while DOING it.
How do you “love yourself” if you cannot accept what you see and what you feel by touching your own precious body?
Do you take care of it? Now you are aware…
Want to go deeper? Now self-pleasure yourself in front of the mirror. Look at your face but even more important, observe what you feel. Observe the taboos, the moral standards, the traumas flowing…
Do you feel shame? How about guilt? Someone watching you?
Be AWARE of all of that to discover who you truly are.
Observe how all of that inside you is being covered by decent words, spiritual concepts, Godly morality, that stuff is defining you, coercing you to comply with the conditioning. Discover the root of it, liberate yourself!
There cannot be innocence while looking at your image in that mirror and caressing yourself, until that rust accumulated over many Life experiences, is cleaned up, cleared. For that stuff will be the “inheritance” you will give to others close to you.
Become AWARE of that.
“What is the most important lesson you have learned in your Life as a seeker?”
1) Your perception depends on your state of consciousness which naturally changes.
2) Everything in Life has a process which needs to be respected.
Some perceive a widget to be “good,” others will see the same “widget” as “bad.”
The widget is neither “good” nor “bad” in itself until we change its quality through our conditioning. In Life everything that has happened and that is happening, is necessary as it is; that is why to qualify something as “good” or “bad” means not to understand the process of change.
There is no “ending” state to reach. It is a full circle. For example, “No-I” will bring “I” and in return,”I” will bring “no-I.” This is an eternal process, the “yin” and “yang” which is meant for Life to self-sustain.
“So what I am supposed to DO in this Life then, if there is no goal to accomplish?”
Do what you desire. What you DO does not matter. What matters is if you are fully enjoying the experience, if you are fully AWARE of the experience.
“Can you be more “real” and give down to earth examples to understand?”
You are taking a shower. Are you enjoying it? Do you feel the water caressing your body? Do you fully enjoy that sensation or some mental conditioning appears? Is your mind not allowing you to be fully in that moment? Is your morality not allowing you to caress yourself? Observe. BE AWARE. No judgment is necessary.
Did you work hard to get your 6 figures dream job? Enjoy it. When joy is no longer there, you may need to change. Are you all stressed out and lying to yourself that you “truly enjoy your job”?
Better stop lying to yourself. Sooner or later things will change, because Life is change.
It does not matter what you choose to DO in Life. In our society it matters because we live with mental ideals and moral standards to accomplish something in this Life or the one beyond. You could become a “beach bum” and sell margaritas for a “living.” Are you enjoying it? Someone may tell you “Why are you wasting your Life in that way?”
If your focus is enjoyment, every moment is joy. Life will go and you will be gone in joy.
That is the most spiritual, grateful way to live Life in my humble opinion. You will teach others without speaking a word. You will be “highly” spiritual, without practicing any ritual. You will be true to yourself, honest; without wearing the mask of trying to BE someone who you are not meant to BE. You will be DOING “good” without intending to DO it; thus “true,” egoless DOING.
When you are naked like that… is when society/religions and “isms” will desperately try to “save you,” by dressing you up.
“…But, what is the meaning of Life… it has to have a beginning and we should have a purpose for being here… You have not responded anything but merely diverted your answers…”
Ok… here I go again: Whatever you say, whatever I say, you can believe it or not. In Life… it does not matter what you believe in. Beliefs are of the mind. Living Life with joy is completely away from the mind. It is “no-mind,” not mindless, but “no-mind.”
“That is completely silly…”
So are your questions. Do you see that “purpose” is not something concerning Life, but it is only a concern of your mind?
“But…there has to be a moment of creation!”
It doesn’t. Everything has always existed, but in different forms. It changes just like Life. Life has always existed, but it changes all the time. It manifests through different forms.
The creator is called “God” but there is no need of a creator, for everything in Life recycles itself, “you” are part of it… or in a more appropriate language, “you” are Life itself.
There is no “big explosion” creating anything. What exists have always existed and recycles itself all the time. Existence has always existed. As it is above, it is below.
For you this could be “another belief,” as you believe a scientist with his latest “discoveries” or a religious credo, but if you observe Nature without using your mind to ask and resolve questions, but intently BEING there, you will know. Life will tell you the “secrets” and you will know without asking a question or regurgitating a belief. What you know cannot be put into words.
“That is nonsense. I will die. I cannot live 200 years.”
That “I” who you think you are is what you can perceive. That is the separation that is killing you with fear and anxiety. There is more that you cannot perceive due to the layers of conditioning affecting your mind and your emotions.
Take away those layers, and you will see something different.
In fact, that is the whole journey of a seeker.
Take away the layers of mental conditioning and fear, start living away from the mind and through the feelings of your heart… you will never ask again those meaningless “deep” questions.
The mind wants a logical answer, but it can only get beliefs.
Any answer could satiate your mind for a moment, but never your heart.
Because you are Life, the Universe itself, the answers are already within you; but paradoxically; “you” cannot see them unless that “you” goes away.
That is the journey.
There are not deep questions in Life, but only for the mind.
“You” are here. Enjoy the experience.
“You” will not be here in the future. That is the mind. Forget about it.
“You” are here until “you” are not. Live it completely. Become aware of it, for when “you” are not, then truly… “you” are… 🙂 A wave in the Ocean of Life goes away and then… a new one appears. “you” think you are the wave, in fact… you are the Ocean.
The polarity of having sex and not having it, is the journey when sex becomes a problem, an outlet for repressions or a solution to find love.
The way we “look” describes the way we “feel.”
I am not just talking about on how the body looks, but deeper than that, is our vibrational energy.
“What is that?”
Let us say that you are interviewing people for a job. You have standard questions and all of them answered “correctly.” How do you select an appropriate candidate?
Some may talk beautifully, if we are only listening to words. The “right” answer is there.
But, they will not be able to hide their anxiety, their “A” personality vibes, their insecurity and their level of fear. For someone who is conscious, aware, those things become clues, which are beyond rationality.
Those vibrational states cannot be changed by following a “method.” Those are there as a consequence of living Life; that is, our attitude towards our experiences in Life.
For most, sexuality is an outlet for inner violence. There is an energy exchange and the purpose for most is to release that energy in a violent way.
There are many levels of violence.
The way we eat could be violent. No time to taste and to enjoy our food, but it is a matter to swallow it with anxiety (labeled as hunger for many) that is violence, for we are not taking care of ourselves, we are not aware of our need for enjoyment and nourishment.
Similarly is with sex.
Excitement, arousal could be turned into a violent act to “get off,” to satiate the itch, to release the pressure.
Nevertheless, in the enjoyment and relaxation, in the state of giving and receiving energies, in the rhythmic breathing and conscious slow movement, lies the energy which is able to regenerate the self, to reconstruct it.
The above is not a “technique.” The above is the “natural” outcome of being at peace with himself/herself.
That “peace” comes from openness. Less beliefs, less taboos, less emotionality, less traumas and less anger.
That is why, it is not a “technique” for everyone to follow.
Therefore, the level of enjoyment and regeneration that sexuality is able to fulfill is proportional to the level of “inner work.”
For many, sexuality is tinted with trauma and the need to release. Pleasure is mixed up with guilt and violence.
That state couldn’t be any other thing but the outcome of our vibrational state.
Nevertheless, it is in the build up of that pleasurable energy how the first chakra will be energetically connected with the 7th, that energy could be exchanged and expanded, to take the pressure off the first chakra.
When we go beyond the excitement and the sense of touch while enjoying the experience, is when that energy transforms itself into those “good feelings” that everyone is looking for.
We are energy, because Life is energy. Feelings are energy.
Sexuality then, is no longer something bringing contradictory feelings and emotions, but it is a source of regeneration, closeness, enjoyment and… love.
We will look as we feel. 🙂
“I” rhymes with “God.” “I” rhymes with “doing.”
“I” rhymes with guilt, shame and sorrow…Isn’t it a bit hollow?
“No-I” rhymes with nothing and thus, there is freedom and joy without looking for it.
“Nothing” rhymes with “Everything.”
“You” are not doing anything. “You” are not deciding anything. As a matter of fact, that static “you” don’t even exist… There is existence as there is the sky… but the sky has no “I” to single itself out.
“That is a lie! “I” am here. “I” think therefore, “I” exist…”I” can decide, “I” can change… “I” can do so many things!”
Never mind that “I” don’t know how I became corrupt. Never mind that “I” do not know how “I” became a sinner. What is important is to change, “now”!!
Life is like a roller coaster. Would you say that it is “you” who is moving the little cart? The cart goes up and so “you.” The cart goes down and so “you.” When you are “down,” it is evident that you will go “up.” Perhaps “you” want to say that it is “you” the one “making effort”?…the one deciding to “go up”?
That is the “I.” You will truly pray when you are down. When you are not down; if you pray, it will not be praying… but acting.
Up and down, just like left and right, just like north and south, just like good and evil, just like right or wrong, fat and thin, cruel and compassionate, virtuous and sinner… Do you see the game?
The cart goes up and the little kid is there enjoying “going up.” Then… the cart stops and whooom! It goes down… Shall the kid cry and get upset? Isn’t to be in the tracks of the roller coaster of Life, the name of the game?
Going down is the opportunity to go up. Once “up,” you’ll go down…
“But what is the meaning of all of that? What is the purpose? What do I need to do in Life?
How can I be all the time “up” and not “down”? What is the method? Who is the true God that could help me? What is this Life trying to teach me?”
NOTHING. 🙂 But the “I” could make up the teachings…
Just enjoy the ride….Allow for the inner kid to smile.
There is “No-I” in that. No rhyme or reason…
Most dread the thought of being alone. There is fear of loneliness. Their time to look inside, has not arrived yet…Loneliness becomes aloneness. Fulfillment is there
The “normal” basic teaching is the following:
Everything you are looking for is outside of you. Search and get it.
Want happiness? Get it from over there. If that doesn’t work, try something else.
Want love? Get into a relationship with someone. If that doesn’t work, try harder next time…
Want to have insurance for the afterlife? Get to know God. Flavors may vary according to the shop you visit.
Want to hang on to something just for the sake of companionship?
Yes…. all of those things are “outside” of you.
As “seekers” went “outside,” another teaching came up, the “opposite:”
The “experts” conclude: “It makes sense. It is important, etc, etc. “
Let us talk about it. Let us make an intellectual ideal of what is like to “know thyself.” Let us come up with a method to “reach there.”
However, very few are willing to pay the price.
To know thyself, you must experience what is like to be alone…how loneliness changes into aloneness.
Because until and unless you are perfectly comfortable with your own self, without company, without a support group, without someone to lean on… until that point hasn’t been reached, we will dependent on something or someone. It is that dependency the one that will bring suffering when that which has given us support at one point in the past, is gone.
This does not mean that tomorrow I will look for the cave near me and stay there for a month, or that I will reject every individual close to me for they will bring “attachment.” That is a misinterpretation and a compulsive behavior.
It is the price to pay when “doing” before “being.”
The inner lie may go something like this:
“ I stayed alone in a cave for 1 year.” “ I was in complete silence for 365 days.”
Impressive!… and what is what your mind was “doing” during that time?
Crying? Counting the days? Toughen it up? Miserable time, huh?
Yes, it is a great story to impress “others.” Something to put in our resume for “guru-hood,” but nothing else.
As long as there is no natural enjoyment of that experience, we are completely fakes.
Enjoyment is the keyword at every step in Life.
The experience of being alone will come to every single one of us at its own time. The length of time will be different for everyone, but when it comes; if we try to run away, we will be in despair.
For instance, observe a relationship in your Life. What is the “worst” that could happen?
Perhaps that our partner may leave. If you are not comfortable with yourself, you will suffer in a proportional amount of your attachment.
Some religious groups have misinterpreted the above, by supporting a lifestyle of not having human relationships for the sake of being alone, with the “goal” of avoiding suffering, without realizing that to suffer may be part of the necessary process to change our consciousness. Suffering is not “bad,” but many times…necessary.
To learn to respect the process of suffering of the self and others is part of learning in Life.
Life is relationship. But the first and most important relationship is with your own self.
Your body, your self-perception, your mental health, your tranquility… all of those are important to be in balance.
If someone is continually hurting himself by denying or sabotaging himself the gifts of health, serenity and mental stability; how is it possible for that person to love another?
It is impossible, unless we mean by “love” to be jealous, angry, violent and moody with our partner. That is the “normal” stuff.
The “outside” is never to be blamed for the issues that we have “inside,” for the outside is the inside.
To go into the experience of aloneness is not a life style. It is a natural path to inner knowledge, for the one who is ready. For the one who is not ready, it may be a miserable experience.
Life will bring sooner or later that experience to us. There is no need to join a religious group for this, just to be aware that is happening.
Enjoyment of our own company is the most spiritual thing someone could “practice.”
Love what you consider to be yourself. Treat it well. Give it “quality time,” then we could be ready for others in our Life.
Looking for others to fulfill what we lack, is the romantic trap that we have learned.
We can only give to others what we ARE. If we are empty of neediness, we have the whole world to give, there will be fulfillment.
Embrace your aloneness. It is something to cherish, it is the opportunity to be wholesome… One.
To be alone and to be in company are 2 extremes of the same rope. We hold on to one extreme… eventually, we will reach the other. We become attached to one experience, there will be suffering when it is time to let go and reach the other side… 🙂
Life does not give teachings. We recognize them as such.
Bart is an avid bicycle rider. He loves the sensation of being caressed by the air… the feeling of sweat running down his body through pedaling. He also appreciates the light and shine of a Sunny day, its warmth and overall nourishment…
Shorts and a visor is all he needs; but if he could do with less clothing; he would.
One morning, he went on and had a flat tire. That was the first time in many years. As he didn’t have a repair kit with him, he walked back. Fortunately he didn’t have to walk that much. That was the first calling.
Bart decided to buy a repair kit with a tube in case he had a flat again.
As Life has it a few weeks later; Bart had another flat in the rear tire, which is the most difficult one to change. Bike riders stopped by to ask if Bart needed help, but Bart thought that he could handle it. Because Bart had a spare tube, he was able to change the tire and fortunately there was an air station close by to fill the tire with air.
Bart was happy of his good luck! 🙂 He resumed pedaling … but on his way back… He had another flat!
Fortunately as the first time, he didn’t have to walk too much.
That was the second call.
Bart hesitated to bring a pump with him. Too much of a hassle! He thought.
A few months after that incident, Bart had another flat tire! This time he was far away from the air station and no one seemed to stop to give him a hand! It was the rear tired of course, Bart managed to change it but he had no air to fill it!
Barefooted and without help he walked for 1 hour. There was no biker carrying a pump with them and no one seemed to care…
What is the moral of this story?
We could come up with many things.
“Always bring a pump with you! Could be such one.”
“Don’t rely on anyone. Carry all you need with you.”
“Don’t ride a bicycle outdoors. It is dangerous!”
“Pray before you go on your bike journey.”
“Get a better a bike…”
As Bart was walking back, he caught his thoughts in “complaining mode.” Once he caught them, they were released and he was able to appreciate the sunshine, the walk back without purpose, the feeling that at the end, there is no particular place to go, no need to hurry up, but just to look at the scenery and enjoy the view.
Bart did not make of that story a traumatic experience.
In Life many times we receive “warnings.” If we don’t hear them good enough, the following time will be even harder to hear, but it is the “I” meeting the challenge of the day, who will interpret the need for change. It could be the pain, the sorrow, the grief, the uncomfortable situation, which could traumatize that “I” to the point of making a shift… but that is not truly change…
That is just a fight between the “I” and Life. The “I” does not have a chance, but the “I” will keep trying. Once the “I” gives up, surrenders, etc. we may believe that we have changed for the best, that we flow in Life, let go, move on etc.
We do not.
True change does not happen through surrender, through the feeling of being crushed by Life as a victim…
Change comes when while living an episode; there is no biased story in our minds.
Bring your pump with you but not out of fear.
If you fell off the bike, stand up and keep walking… if you can… If you remember the story with intensity, the pain; fear will be created and the bike, which is a simple bike… will be feared.
A trauma has been created.
To trust Life is to know that whatever direction it will take us, it will be the absolute best for us. That direction is not our destination, but just another biking path to try, enjoy and move on…That is known as to live.