We rely heavily on words to understand. We think we know, when we got the concept or a definition. “Life/Spirituality” is not in the realm of words and language. Words are merely vague descriptions.
For example, the “problem” is “anger.” The solution is to be “centered.” Thus, to “practice” being centered, is the “homework” to attain the label “conqueror of anger.”
Anger is not a problem. The consequences on how we handle that energy is the issue. Anger is an experience, an emotional experience which needs to be observed, conscious of, aware of. If we label it as a “problem,” we are denying the other side of duality.
“What is that?”
The same energy that produces anger in one extreme, is the same one that will produce compassion on the other side.
Daylight and night are the experience of what we label as a day. Both come together. If we make a “problem” out of daylight, then our days will be fixated in “solving” something that does not need to be solved, only observed.
In the “office world,” we are taught to “solve problems.” We are trained to be “problem solvers.” That same mentality does not “work” in Life. There is nothing to “solve” but rather to be aware of as everything changes at its own time. We could push change by following our own agenda, by using violence and hide it with pretty labels such as “justice,” “the need of the time,” etc.
Our society, morality, values, spiritual coaches and religions are typically caught up in identifying “good,” defining it, labeling it and “practicing it.” That mentality does not have any depth. Any change in it is superficial.
Observe how many laws and codes of conduct man has followed throughout history. Observe that any change in human psychology has been superficial. Only in behavior and as long as someone is “watching.”
That is how God was needed. An honest, “God fearing individual” knows that “God is watching him,” thus that is no honesty at all. It is just a “spiritual” façade.
“To practice good” is the most dishonest behavior a person could engage in.
You ARE. If you practice something that you aren’t, you are merely covering that which you ARE with some belief of what “should be.” BE AWARE of what you ARE so change can happen.
A person “practicing” to be centered as to avoid anger, is making himself believe that he is achieving something. The reality is that the word “centered” is misleading our mind. Thus, I will practice what I believe to be “centered.”
My belief is based on my understanding, my interpretation of some spiritual class, some “best seller” book or just my understanding of the dictionary definition of the word “centered.”
Observe that we are caught up in words. We are caught up in the understanding of the mind. Just observe the energy of anger (don’t even use that label internally) without reacting. Be aware of it, let it go through you. This is to acknowledge the process.
Most individuals only want the “magic pill,” the “method to get rid of anger.” That is why “spiritual salesman” of quick-fixes are making a living by “helping others.”
Those individuals buying quick-fixes are not ready yet for inner Awareness. The same happens with Tantra. A “quick fix” to have “great sex,” to “last longer” will not necessarily lead to a fulfilling Life. Selling the icing of the cake without the cake is like building a house without foundation.
“But Ahnanda… you have written good arguments but you have not given a solution to anger… “
Well my friend, it seems that the above hasn’t been understood. I wonder If I am not using the “right words.”
Here is your “solution.” Remove yourself from the world for 90 days. Live by yourself, alone without any human company, TVs, phones, computers, etc. When you go back to the “real world,” you will be AWARE and sensible about the energy of anger.
“But Ahnanda… that is not practical. We have to make a living, we have jobs, studies, relationships, a life to take care of…”
I understand. Then, follow a quick fix. Pick any. Practice it… Pay for it so it is “worth it.” Ask for a money back policy. Would that work?
“Ahnanda… you surprise me. First you say that “quick fixes” are only superficial, but yet you are giving me that “solution” to my serious enquire about anger. Why are you doing that?”
Ah! My friend…So you don’t get angry. See, I am “helping you.” 🙂
“I’d like to share a revelation that I’ve had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you’re not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment but you humans do not. You move to an area and you multiply and multiply until every natural resource is consumed and the only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You’re a plague and we are the cure.” Agent Smith – in the movie the Matrix.
If you look at the above statement, it has some “truth” and some “falsehood.” Just like everything in Life. There are 2 extremes and everything in between. It just depends on which side someone wants to take.
For an “android” like Mr. Smith it is easy to separate himself from the human species.
For a human, the above may be an extremist perception.
Mark and his wife decide to have 5 kids. They want to enjoy their growth and they know that this episode of raising kids will be relatively fast, therefore; they are willing to “sacrifice.”
That is “good”! What a “happy” family!
In the bigger picture, however; Agent Smith’s description is accurate.
That is how we find that something considered “good,” may not be 100%. Likewise, something considered “bad,” or “wrong” and “right.”
Every duality has a point of union. That is a gray area for our “black or white” morality.
This will bring us to another “revelation” of Life: Something which is “real” has the equal potential to be “good or bad,” “right or wrong.”
You have a knife. It has the same potential to be helpful or harmful. It just depends on your viewpoint, your circumstances, your previous experiences… and your intention.
“So what about God? Isn’t “Him” 100% good?”
Ahem… yes… what about “Him”?
Those who have ears will hear.
A belief is neither “right nor wrong.” It has timing. When timing is not respected then that belief is not according to the movement of Life. It becomes antiquated.
The “black or white” mentality and morality is the disease. Why? Because it does not fit the “reality” of change, movement, but it supports stagnation, through the belief of static ideals which cannot be “true” in a world of changes.
The “reality” of Life cannot be understood by those who are conditioned through static ideals, extreme beliefs and ego driven minds. It is all in the mind.
Of course, the above may be misunderstood by many. It could be labeled as “bad.”
It is “natural.” That is why, a “best seller” may be “good” for you…
Something that may tell you how “good you are.” Something that may teach you how to “materialize your desires.” Something that may give you the key for wealth, happiness and love in your life… 100% good and “real.” 🙂
I received some feedback from the last article. Take it easy, Would ya? I am not writing to take away your toys… No! I am just sharing. 🙂
Just as “success and failure” are toys to play with, to entertain ourselves while Life passes by us; there is a stronger ideal which hasn’t been observed: To sacrifice.
“To sacrifice for an ideal is the utmost that a human can do for humanity.” Isn’t that the teaching? Isn’t that the “nice” phrase to live by and quote in our power point presentations?
To confuse matters, the “Office World” has provided some catchy phrases: “To sacrifice is to love.”
Love has nothing to do with sacrifice. As a matter of fact, we sacrifice because there is no love. When we sacrifice we give up something in order to get something else. That something else can be for us in the “future” or to “help” someone else… we believe.
In short, we frustrate ourselves “now,” we block ourselves. That frustration can go as far as offering your own Life for the “benefit of mankind,” it is said; although it hasn’t happened. Life continues on. You live, you die… you live again. Isn’t that the “spiritual teaching”? Why do you sacrifice for? 🙂 Become AWARE of who you ARE do not cover it with pretty phrases and cinderella ideals…
In the movie “Superman II;” Superman did not hesitate to give up his powers to have a human experience with his girlfriend, Lois Lane. Was that a sacrifice?
No. He simply followed his heart. He was honest with himself.
A religious group may label him as “egoist,” because he didn’t “sacrifice for the sake of humanity.” Imagine if Superman decided to play “Saint” and sacrificed his feelings for the sake of an ideal. He would have been a frustrated “superhero.” Saving others would be sacrifice , work. Love couldn’t touch his heart, because his mind was engaged into DOING what is deemed to be “right” by others, over his own feelings.
Through Life experiences, Superman learned about his mission in Life and satisfied with the human experience he experienced, he was ready to continue, not out of a compulsion; but out of maturity, out of living a process in Life.
Superman recovered his powers because his father foresaw this “human” incident and gave the opportunity to his son. Once Superman passed this test by “failing it,” Superman was ready to continue alone without his father’s advice. Out of love, his father disappeared. Superman and his mission in Life were one.
What would have happened if Superman was forbidden by his father to experience the love of a girlfriend for the sake of his mission? That would have been a sin against his own son. Total lack of respect to his human nature and his own process. That is violence.
Any sacrifice is void of love. Many times “failure” is part of the “success” but it happens when we are honest with our deepest feelings… 🙂
Once upon a time, little Timmy was an angry baby. He wanted his way or no way; but he realized that he had to fight, win, struggle, in order to “achieve” what he had in mind. He labeled that “competitive mentality” as what is “right, moral, good, proper, perfect” for him.
Labels make a great difference in our morality.
Anyway, Little Timmy was able to express his anger up until he was 6 or so. Timmy lacked awareness of what that expression was causing in the environment and him. Then, it was time for the “office world” training. Timmy had to go to school. At that point, to express his anger was unacceptable. Every kid wanted things his own way!
Then, the “law” came into effect. “If you express your tantrums freely, you are going to get in trouble, but if you talk it out; then you may get a golden star in your chart…”
That is how, the conditioning started. The “Office world” works under the premise of rewards and punishment. Nice duality to be trained in.
Little Timmy was still angry, but now he had to be “clever” not to show it and to wait until he got home to express it, as he was able to do before school.
Observe that the “office world” is not interested in the way Little Timmy feels. It is not even interested in Little Timmy’s awareness of that energy of anger. The “Office world” is interested in actions or lack of them. The feeling behind does not matter. “Good actions”= Reward program= points for Heaven. “Bad actions”= Punishment, jail time= hell= karma. Those were the equations little Timmy needed to be aware of.
Timmy (no longer little) became “proficient” with the hogwash: “Hide your feelings. Give everyone what they would like to hear.” Use the “right” labels. Embellish them. What Little Timmy wasn’t aware of, is that he believed that hogwash to be the proper way to behave with others but he expected others to be “true” to themselves. That is how, he had a couple of “romantic” experiences where he felt disappointed.
Timmy wanted to find meaning to a Life covered by “proper behaviors and etiquette” for he did not find fulfillment. His horizon had a couple of “choices:” Go with the gold medalists, prove how great “you are,” sacrifice for paper money, build a name for yourself, become “immortal” among mortals by making sure that someone will remember your name (label) 200 years down the road… OR become someone beyond your mortality. That is how, religion XYZ appeared in his path.
Now, Timmy had a purpose, a “reason” to be alive. He felt instantly important, because the “boss of all bosses” (he learned that training from the office world) was with him: God.
With God, things were simple. This is “good,” that is “bad.” Do you see the line?
Anger is “bad.” Timmy wanted to align with God but he didn’t know how to get rid of that anger. That is the time when guilt appeared. Before his religious experience, there was no guilt. Now, guilt surrounds him.
Are religions “bad,” then?
No! Observe that Timmy had an answer for his “purpose in Life,” for his mental quest to “be someone.” Now, little by little through all the traumas that he will gather, he will learn to be “no one.”
Is the “office world” bad?
No! It is like playing a different game. The trauma appears when we believe that this game is “reality.” The office world, the religion, the school system… all games. Play.
Timmy will go through all the suffering necessary for Awareness to arrive. When that happens as all true stories; Timmy will live happily ever after…
Did you like my little bed story? 🙂
“Yeah brother. We all got the same problems: Guilt, regret…”
(The Falcon to Captain America in the “Winter soldier” movie.)
Do we see why, “we all got the same problems”?
Yes, it is the “I” at the end of the road; but many cannot see that far. However, guilt and regret are closer, they can be seen on a daily basis. For many the “I” is a metaphysical entity. Guilt and regret are tangible even though they are intimately related with the “I.”
Why do we feel guilty? Because of the “choice” we made or didn’t make. Guilt will give us a sense of being worthless, it will diminish our self-respect. That guilt will bring his brother “regret” with him. They come together.
Sadness, melancholy, a sense of despair will surround the person experiencing regret.
“I must not lose my temper.” That is the goal. I will add a religious belief to it such as:” God punishes/does not like/does not help people losing their temper.” Now I have motivation to change.
However, Life presents that which I reject. What is that?
The opportunity to lose my temper. 🙂
Then, I feel sinful. Worthless. I may need to ask for forgiveness, for I have “failed.” I “made a choice” which is not what “God likes.” Then, self-punishment will be added into the mix, so I can obtain “God’s grace” again. That is the martyr syndrome: Life is about sacrifices. No time to play. We have truly learned the conditioning of “reward and punishment.”It has been instilled in us. Our society works through that.
If you are not the religious type, then guilt and regret may come stronger for there may not be an opportunity to be “forgiven.” Then you can try “losing yourself,” through some self-destructive activity.
That energy of guilt will stay in us even though intellectually, we know that it is unnecessary.
That is an emotion which needs to be released. Intellectual understanding does very little when it is about releasing emotions. Do we want an example?
Let me go into the “classic” guilt of our society and religious beliefs: Sex.
You were a baby, your parents told you not to touch “down there.” They looked at you with disgust when you were exploring your body and the pleasure that it could offer you in a very innocent way. Remember the time when you first masturbated? I know, it was a “mistake.”Did you tell your parents? What did the priest say? It is true that society accepted your exploration openly? Were you an example? Were your congratulated?
Remember when walking naked around the house was “alright” and then the time when that changed? Did someone tell you “Don’t do it” or suddenly you felt shame like Adan and Eve, and covered your “private parts” with leaves, when God was around?
Society preaches that the “human body is beautiful,” but yet that same society arrests someone who is naked at the beach, while enjoying the Ocean and the Sun. Yeah, the human body has some “sinful” parts that need to be covered. Correct? After all, to be prudish is “moral” and God likes “moral” people.
Yes… There is plenty of guilt and shame about sexuality. It has been going for many generations already. How could we speak about enjoying life then, if we fear an important, integral part of Life ?
It is not possible. Fear will arrive every time we challenge the conditioning. The mind will hang onto moral standards as the symbol of “righteousness.” You see, the mind is only interested in being “right” but not in enjoying Life. (to be continued.)
The importance of feelings cannot be overstated. Through feelings we feel fulfilled, satisfied in Life. Love is a feeling and such is happiness, what else do we need?
Note that the word “feeling” is not enough to express the experience. We could use the word “emotion” to add complexity for the mind wants to “understand.” Spirituality is not about repeating concepts, it is mostly about your inner experience, your inner observation, how aware we could be. Labels only confuse, segregate, separates, dissects the experience.
Please consider the following not as a belief or as interesting info. Just see it in yourself, if you could see these descriptions in “you.”
The feeling that brings fulfillment is the one coming from the BEING itself through the “gut,” thus a “gut feeling.”
Take the time to observe it and recognize it. Some may call this “intuition” which is another label pointing to the same direction. Japanese medicine knows this area as “hara,” and in Chinese medicine it is known as “lower Dantian,” or the “sea of Qi.” It is not only the “gut” or the stomach, but the manifestation of vitality of BEING in this physical plane.
When that zone is relaxed, you feel relaxation, you feel good!
Perhaps we could observe 3 main centers of “feelings.”
The gut or “hara” as explained above is the main one but, we are not in touch with it. BEING according to our role in Life will manifest there. That is honesty in a nutshell. Our conditioning is to sugar coat that with thoughts, beliefs, ideas we have been exposed to and which we consider “thoughtfully,” “mindfully” speaking, to be “right.”
The second center is the heart. Thus, “heart feelings.”
We have been conditioned to believe that the “heart” has the most important feelings to “listen to.” Nevertheless, the “feelings from the heart” come actually from the mind. Those “feelings” have the conditioning of many past experiences.
For instance “love.” It is a label with many meanings. There is love for parents, for siblings, for offspring, for a partner, etc. All of those forms of love are different, but yet we use the same label: “love.” Where is the conditioning? In the way that we should express a particular “love” for a particular relationship. Observe “Love to God.”
Why do we use the “father” type of love? or even the “beloved” one? Is that what is missing in your Life? Why isn’t there a particular type of love for God as there is for a sister, a father, a son?
If you are aware of your conditioning, there will be greater openness in you.
Finally, the center in the head, which we label as “mind,” “brain,” etc. That is where most people function. That center is the furthest away from the gut. We use reason, logic, words to create our world.
For instance, you may hear poetry. The words “touched you.” The mind has been touched. A word brings the experience as the mind has a particular meaning for a particular word. “ My heart has been touched while hearing that beautiful poetry.”
Words… don’t bring an experience other than the one we believe they mean. The word “snake” could bring different reactions in people according to their experiences, however, for mainstream, that word brings a negative connotation due to religious beliefs or sexual hang ups. Conditioning.
That “feeling” is conditioning “stored” in the mind.
Again please observe those centers within yourself, otherwise; the above will just feed your mind with additional information.
In spirituality, knowing is BEING it. Not READING about it.
As long as the “I” is strong, our experiences with the “other world” will be with a Santa Claus type of God.
What is that? A God that will pamper our ego, a God that can make us feel “special,” “chosen.”
Why? We are not ready to look inside. We may see the experiences in our Life as violent, ugly and we think: “The world is an ugly place.” We do not realize that it is just a mirror of what is going inside. It does not matter what we think or what we believe, just what we ARE. The pampering of our ego is necessary so we could feel good about ourselves. “You are beautiful, you are good, that is why I have selected you.” We are unable to look inside, it hurts, that is why we blame “others.”
So what do we do? We go out in the world and proselytize our experience, “the true one,” so then followers can jump in the bandwagon and call themselves “special,” “the only ones who have the truth.” Thus, a Christian Santa, a Muslim Santa, a Brahma Kumaris Santa, even a Buddhist Santa will appear to particular individuals for they are ready for the trip of self-realization. Then, followers will use that opportunity to fight against each other in the name of “God.”
As mentioned many times, because our ego needs to increase to its full capacity before it dissolves.
I am not relating a theory or another belief. Just look around! If you go left, you will end up going right. Before you go “up,” you must experience going down. In our society ruled by the mind, politics and religion are tremendous tools to increase that ego.
Of course, none of that is “bad.” It is just part of our experience in Life. Thus, we find every type of individual at different stages of consciousness, each one manifesting in Life their own part, their own role; for every single part is necessary as it is for the whole. That is how we are all One.
Thus, it is childish to judge a particular role by using certain moral standards, when the above has been understood.
Nevertheless, because we live in this society and not in utopia, we may need to follow their principles, laws, to live together. That is how we learn to integrate the “office world” of our society with Life, we keep that oneness rather than labeling the “office world” as “corrupt” or “hellish.” Those labels only increase our rejection towards it; thus our ego, as we separate from “what is.”
Of course, If you do this, it is not “bad” either, but just know that it will change, it will be the opposite sooner or later, perhaps in another Life, but it will happen, for it is the complete experience.
The “office world” could be noisy, it could be violent and that is the perfect type of scenario for every one of us to look inside. It is not a mistake or a random act what is happening. It is perfect. Trust Life.
Therefore, spirituality cannot be separated from living Life. It is not about escaping from Life to another realm, but integration, being part of it… and that is how the magic of “lesser I” will open the doors into the immensity of all.
Until then, enjoy your experience with the Santa of your “choice.” It is part of your process of evolving into a different consciousness.
If you go left, you must go right. Why? Because Life is a circle. 🙂