Tagged: integration
Transcending duality
The paradox of the human race is that in order to have an organized, predictive lifestyle; a society was embraced.
That same society, is the origin of the human frustration and search for freedom.
This freedom is not the childish “freedom” of a nation over another. This freedom is a deep calling for expression, the liberation of the “hell” given by the “others”.
The establishment of a society ruled by the mind and reason, originated the denial of the animal side of a human being. That denial has produced all sorts of repressions, emotional traumas and mental diseases.
Society regulates, prohibits, punishes. Interestingly; God does the same thing, in mainstream religion. “In God we trust”.
Although the Universe is unity; most humans can only perceive separation. “Things” are separated and have no relationship. “Things” are by themselves. In that consciousness, “choosing” becomes the word to worship. It is the word that brings the illusion of freedom.
To live in society is about choice. There are many things to choose from. We will choose according to what is “good for me” according to our conditioning. It is that vision which is not inclusive of the Totality the one bringing undesired consequences. For most humans, it is “survival of the fittest”.
Human beings ruled by this impression, are unable to relax and enjoy Life. To achieve something, to beat someone else, to win whatever, becomes important. Perplexingly enough, these individuals like to talk about “getting” love, peace and happiness.
“This is bad” that is “good”. Do what is good. Reject what is bad.
Those are the holy words, the great teaching of society through moralists and “holy” men.
Nevertheless, what is “bad” is typically the “animal side.” The rejection of this side makes hypocrites: They themselves are unable to follow what they preach. It is a continuous battle inside.
The morality of most humans is concerned in becoming “angels and deities” by rejecting their animal side. They are not concerned in being fully humans now, but always about the future, in becoming something through rejection of their own realities.
That is why, to embrace all energies by integrating them rather than choosing through dualistic standards, becomes the “new” paradigm to fully acknowledge ourselves and transcend duality. The idealist perceptions and mental ideas are dissolved through the reality of feelings. A genuine feeling of self-acceptance, which builds the ground for inner understanding.
An animal does not know to be an animal. Just like a toddler. He is not concerned in such “knowledge”. Once we become aware of that “knowledge” problems will start because, we will reject according to our conditioning.
Is knowledge evil?
Neither good nor evil. It is part of what we are and needed to live in society. It is the difference between a full animal and humans. We are AWARE of our animal side. Animals may not be aware of this. Throughout history, we have chosen to reject that animal side and label it as “devilish, lower, ugly, bad,” etc.
Now, is the time to acknowledge it, to integrate it, to value it… to feel wholesome and human… again. This is Tantra.
Not everyone is ready for this, for before accepting the animal side; we need to fully reject it. We are talking about many Life times of experiences. This is the full range of experiences of humans… from “Yoga to Tantra.”
That is why Tantra, is not for everyone… but for those who are ready. 🙂
Why is there so much suffering?
Could we say that it is “our choice” to suffer?
That is ridiculous.
Suffering is in proportional relationship to the extent of the “I,” the ego. That is not a choice, but part of experiencing Life: To go to one side of the range of experiences, just to go to the other.
Thereby, why insist in the popular “happiness is our choice”?
Some want to get away from suffering, not realizing about the size of their ego, their “I.”
Suffering is their medicine, to reduce that oversized “I.”
Could suffering be “bad” then? 🙂
Many are hoping for a God to save them from that suffering, to give them eternal bliss and happiness… Observe that their level of consciousness hasn’t reached the maturity for self-discovery; however, those individuals are in the process of getting there… little by little.
That is why wherever someone “is” in Life, that is “good” for there can only be change.
Change does not happen as quickly, when the “I” opposes to Life, as the “I” insists in being something different than Life, to be separated from it.
Any ideas that we are invested into which promote our static personality; those things will be a way to slow down our own evolution.
We could then think that we need to get rid of the “I” for happiness to prevail.
That is just an idea, a belief of a mind centered in duality. The simplistic thought goes something like:
If the “I” causes suffering, then let us get rid of the “I.”
Let us create methods to do it.
Let us pray to a god to liberate us from suffering.
Let us believe that we have a choice to step out of our own process and become someone, just because “I” want it.
Do you want to expedite your own change? Make it a quicker process? Do you want a shortcut?
Life does not work that way. We must walk the path. We will take every single step of the way.
Thus, enjoy the process.
The caterpillar becomes a butterfly. The butterfly will become dust.
Our society is so “happy” to choose the butterfly over the caterpillar or over dust… A religion would like us to believe that a butterfly is “better” than a caterpillar, but it is obvious that it is the same thing but transformed…and that we are conveniently forgetting dust as part of the process of transformation.
It is the awareness of the process, the experience itself what brings insight to every individual. That insight is first hand knowledge.
In Life, no one can give you knowledge. All they can give you is information, just like reading Wikipedia.
Can knowledge liberate us from suffering?
Knowledge when it comes from your own experience liberates you from suffering by allowing you to integrate that suffering as part of living Life, as part of the process… It becomes a push for further change if the “I” does not make a trauma out of that.
That is that CHANGE in a nutshell: To integrate all aspects in Life.
When there is complete acceptance of it as continuous change … it is no longer suffering. We know everything will change.
That is when the struggle of the caterpillar will terminate, and will allow it to become that butterfly. The inner fight makes it into a painful process; until we give up, surrender, accept it, become open to it…many words to convey the same experience.
The caterpillar, the butterfly and dust, have many things in common.
but different timing, different circumstances, different setting.
We ARE always different.
Relative Polarity in a mental world of absolutes
The truth is not absolute neither relative. Then, what is it?
“Something” neither relative nor absolute…We could call it “nothing.”
In Life we could see that every scene has a polarity.
That polarity is what is known as “good,” “bad,” “right,” “wrong,” “sinful,” “virtuous,” etc.
The majority of people are so caught up with those labels which are so deeply ingrained through “education,” that trauma will be experienced in their lives.
All those apparent “opposites” are complements of each other. All those opposites are there, because the other side exists.
There is no way for fear to exist without the existence of courage. There is no way for love to exist without hate.
What is courage in the “normal” realm of duality? Less fear. There is a degree, a constant movement that we label in different ways. If the scale of experiences is between 1 and 10, Courage is 1; fear is 10. Indifference is 5.
A person experiencing fear is closer to courage for after the number “10” is reached (fear,) then number “1” will come into the experience. That is why, the range of experiences is not truly a straight line with 2 different ends, but those ends connect to each other in continuity. The range of experiences is truly a circle and because there is a continuous movement in that circle, it becomes cyclical movement, just like the 4 seasons, just like day and night, just like low and high tide, just like young and old, left and right, up and down, etc.
If the above is fully understood, then a person experiencing indifference has a long way to go before reaching hate or love.There are many experiences in between. Intensity is in the extremes.
Observe the range of experiences, observe that every individual is in a different stage, a different degree from the extremes. If someone has experienced one extreme, without a doubt; the other extreme will experienced.
A religious person who has experienced one extreme of Life such as an ascetic Life style, will experience immediately after that; the opposite, and from that point, the movement will continue. For the untrained observer, that person is only reaching a “balance” from being “out of balance” but note that it is only the degrees of change of experiences, which are moving, that is “going from 10 to 1” in the cycle.
“Balance” exists at every moment, at every position in the range of experiences and for that, we may need to learn to embrace the opposites, rather than judge them or to prefer one side and to despise the other, for if we are aware that we are one side of the equation, we are also the other side. We are both sides…The light and the shadow.
The fox entered the property of the farmer and ate a chicken.
From a human perspective, the chicken belongs to the farmer. The fox committed a crime. The fox is “bad,” a “criminal,” and the “poor” chicken “good.”
The human perspective is not “reality” but merely a perspective. From the perspective of the fox, the chicken was food. To eat that chicken was “good” for the fox. From the perspective of the chicken, that was a “bad” thing. Do we see the polarity in that scene?
Moralists will engage in labeling one side of the polarity as “good” without realizing that “bad” is needed to be there as well.
That scene of the fox and the chicken is void of human morality. That is the way Nature, Life operates.
In Life it is all one event, the chicken is part of the fox now. Life continues on. A chicken may eat worms. Life continues on.
But a human… a human will kill the wolf just because the fox entered his “private property,” and ate his “possession.” He “bought” the chicken with paper money as if Nature cares about the exchange rate. 🙂
Every experience in Life will bring a polarity to be aware of. If we could for a moment set aside the labels of “good, bad, right, wrong,” etc. from our vocabulary, we could observe a different perspective, a different reality.
We could observe that every truth, every single truth is not an absolute, but a perspective based on a particular state of consciousness.
The above realization could be the beginning for the “Life walker,” the seeker, to abandon the path of denial, repression and judgment, for the one of simple openness to Life. That is the path of integration.
Vices will bring virtues … and virtues? vices.
In the surface, the “vices” are ways of bringing humanity down. A way for perdition.
Nevertheless in the world of duality the experience of one extreme means the necessary experience of the other side. How could you know “day” if you have not experienced “night”? In Life, knowing is experience. Without experience there is no “true” change.
That is the journey.
I am not saying that vices are “good.” I am saying they are necessary in the journey of Life as the experience of them will allow us to know, to experience and to transform.
Greed is one extreme. Generosity is another. Our potential to be giving is equal to our potential for greed.
We get confused and biased by the labels we use to describe a human character, but we are only looking at one point, one day of the whole journey. We get caught up with our experience with one person, limiting him to that experience. We don’t see that change is part of it.
For example, if Bruce Wayne (Batman) “developed” anger and guilt through one experience in Life, there is a process to come out of that and transform within himself those energies.
Without that anger and that feeling of guilt, Batman would have never been born. Do we see that? Can we say that anger and guilt are “bad” then?
What would have happened if Bruce Wayne had learned when he was a little boy: “Anger is bad. You must get rid of it”?
Bruce Wayne would have learned to repress anger to conform with a moral code, a perception… but anger would be there.
What would have happened if Bruce Wayne would have been told: “ You must make effort to conquer anger”?
He could have believed that it is in “his” hands ( the “I”) to change BEING at will.
Who is the one making effort? The “I.”
What is anger if is not a supporting energy for that “I”?
How is it possible for the “I” to get rid of a supporting energy, which makes up himself?
That is the deception. Nevertheless, the above is “spirituality” for most; as the time to find about that “I” hasn’t arrived to their journey yet.
Bruce Wayne was meant to be Batman. That was his destiny. In his path, “he found” a teacher when he was ready to transform that anger. Life brought the teacher when the student was ready (as we know) but that teacher was not really a friend for he was helping with an ulterior motive, later on he became Bruce’s enemy.
Shall we judge Life’s method to transform Bruce’s anger?
Why Life didn’t give Bruce an angel to “help” him? Or a saint? Or an “illuminated” one?
Because Bruce Wayne didn’t need that. He was to become Batman.
Bruce Wayne healed his anger and guilt through Batman.
Religious beliefs and moral codes have a “black or white” vision of the different energies that a human could come across, without considering the process of a particular human being.
To label “Lust” as ugly, bad, evil, etc. does not consider the process that every human being will go through. What could be the teaching of experiencing lust?
That love and lust are like water and oil. They don’t mix, they don’t become one.
The typical “medicine” will be to drill in his mind: “sex (or whatever the trigger is) is bad. Don’t do it.”
We may only control our actions, but we cannot control what is natural in a human being. We could repress ourselves by not acting, but without understanding of the circumstances, the setting and the time, that repression will cause damage to ourselves.
Repression is neither “good” nor “bad.” There are times when it is useful and times when it is not. To be able to recognize timing, is part of the inner wisdom which appears as we experience Life in its different facets.
That insight is not learned through holy books or holy teachers. It is the consequence of all experiences that we have had in many Life times. Openness by acknowledging all of those different perspectives of Life, is what minimizes the size of the “I.”
Accumulation of “vices” will make someone a vicious man, but that is the “natural” path as well, for being vice less. It is just a matter of time. Paradoxical!
It will happen as the size of the “I” diminishes. This is not a mental, intellectual exercise, but it is openness of the heart.
Every man is in a different stage of his journey. There is no goal in that journey, all there is; is the journey itself. The words “goal,” “destination,” “objective,” “perfection,” are all beliefs of an intellectual mind when related to Life itself. Those words have the power to make the life of many a very dissatisfied one.
Who is Batman?
Anger, compassion, guilt, forgiveness, millionaire, who experienced in his own skin what is to be poor, a playboy, a faithful man to a woman, a philanthropist who builds weapons; loneliness, aloneness, intelligence, stupidity, ironical sense of humor, seriousness… it is that type of integration, that type of openness and acceptance of the different roles and experiences in his lifetime which will give him the insight to know. It is not about rejection of one side of the coin and acceptance of the other. It is about integration, for in that integration there is healing, acceptance and the opportunity to change, to grow.
To understand that there is more than our own selves, is to understand that as we take the steps to integrate into the totality; there will be the experience of being born again into something greater than our previous small selves. When the “i” becomes smaller, we could see the immensity and beauty of all …
There is no angel who hasn’t been a “sinner.” 🙂
Love yourself
Religious teachings are practically unaware of the world of duality. For those teachings to choose one side and to reject the other side of duality, is considered to be “good, godly, etc.”
A human being has a duality within. That is the male/female energy, which is manifested through a body.
When we identify with the form, we call ourselves “male or female.” Nevertheless, our psyche has to agree with that denomination as well. If it doesn’t then we have the other shades of colors besides the “black and white,” male-female type of standard.
To be aware of our own eternity is to recognize that we had the experience of being a male and a female. To be aware of our own energies is to balance and harmonize male and female. There is no one who is a “pure female” or a “pure male” energy. A “macho guy” represses his femininity to the point where he will be in extreme need of female energy. At that point that neediness has been labeled as “love.”
When someone embraces the path of a seeker, sooner or later loneliness will be faced. That loneliness increases for the need of finding a complementary energy will be always there. It is part of Nature.
Inside ourselves, there is the “inner kid” which most psychologists now agree “exists.” However, there is a “full-family” inside every individual. There is the male- female and kid energies.
To balance those energies is of utmost importance to find that wholeness inside without neediness.
Once that wholeness is found, then to integrate that oneness with “others” is the next step.
“Loving yourself” is more than a “nice spiritual phrase.” It is to recognize our value, worthiness and respect for being. We could start with self caressing ourselves, pamper ourselves, to use this body to manifest that which we would like in a partner.
Obviously the above may not be accepted for there is a strong taboo against touching our own bodies or allowing complementary, natural energies within to manifest.
All of those beliefs are detrimental in harmonizing our energies. We have learned to repress and to live by stereotypes which have given us the notions of what is “good and what is bad.”
Unless we learn to balance our own energies, to live by yourself harmoniously may not be possible. Everyone will go by in our lives. We need to learn to live in balance with ourselves.
By identifying ourselves with a particular “role model” or stereotype, we deny our own manifestation. The “black and white “ belief that a “man” has to be this way and not that way, or “this is the way a woman should act..” is nothing but a belief and as such it is worth only as long as someone gives value to it.
Therefore, to integrate the “family” within is of great value to experience that oneness which is needed to embrace a greater oneness with all.
We cannot pretend to be One when we are needy. We cannot pretend to live harmoniously in a relationship with another person, when we look for our needs to be satisfied by another.
Coffee and milk get together to bring their own flavor into the mix to create something different with their own oneness.
Duality: Self and No-self
We interpret life. We typically do not observe.
It is a wonderful sight to observe how daylight appears from nighttime. The label we use is “dawn.”
That perception of pristine light may be called “paradise,” and darkness “hell” or we can change labels in duality and call them “good” and “bad,” “right” or “wrong,” etc.
Nevertheless, when there is a preference for an experience, a rejection is born out of that preference. The night is not cherished as much as daylight.
“Hell” is despised despite its continuous occurrence and need to be there, for “paradise” to happen.
The above is the belief system and moral standard of many at this time. It is called duality.
Our culture has taught us to “choose” one side considered “good” and reject the other.
Embrace the day and reject the night.
That vision is the cause of inner and outer conflicts.
That vision takes a person into mental and psychological issues.
There is absolutely nothing that “we” have to “do” for nighttime to become daylight again. It will happen by itself, without “our” help.
Do we see that?
What it needs to change is our vision, our attitude in life.
Nighttime offers an experience and so daylight.
When we embrace both without judgment as life experiences, then we don’t reject; but we integrate.
We have been taught that “angels” reject the darkness of the light. They fight for light and conquer evil.
A being of light or an “angel” does not reject any part of duality. A being of light does not reject “hell” and chooses heaven. A being of light integrates both perceptions and experiences so his life remains in joy, in appreciation and in balance according to the movement of time.
Embracing the Totality is what we call harmony. A being of light is harmonious in life.
Life is harmony… if “I am” the Totality, why I am not harmonious?
That is the question. The answer may be the sense of self. There is no flowing in life when we are not life itself.
The symbol of “yin and yang” expresses that beautifully, although that symbol is open to interpretation according to the consciousness of the viewer.
Some will say: “ It is the concept of duality forming a whole.”
That concept is worthless, intellectual stuff.
The symbol of “ying yang” represents life itself, the Totality. That symbol is meant to be in movement just like life.
“Tai-chi “ is that slow movement which represents life. To consciously balance the different energies in the self.
When we truly understand harmony then we can start seeing something different. There is no fight needed. Nothing to conquer.
A life without harmony does not experience joy. That joy “NOW” is the most important item in life from my view.
As long as there is a rejection of a part of life, we will have an internal issue, an emotion that will need to be healed.
Typically we say that “acceptance” of life is needed, but there is no such a thing as “acceptance” when there is “no-self” to be life itself.
Thus, to bring that harmony, there are many elements that life offers in our experience. To use those according to time and circumstances is the art.
Whatever we choose to do or to be matters, as long as there is harmonious joy, balance in living.
That is the bottom line.
The above observation was expressed in a different way by another culture with the word “yoga.”
It is union. It is not the “union” of the “self” with something else, such as “life,” “God,” the “divine,”etc.
It is the union that happens when there is “no-self.”
Is self “bad”?
That question is called “misinterpretation.”
No.
It is just a different experience.
We are so in-tune with “self.” We understand the world in “self.” We follow religious beliefs in “self.”
Through these writings, the invitation is to explore “no-self” and to embrace both,self and no-self; to integrate both experiences, to be harmonious just like the yin-yang symbol.
Want a teacher, a guru for that?
Observe Nature, the plants and the animal kingdom. Learn from their “ignorance” and open your heart to appreciate with thankfulness the marvelous opportunity to feel life by being aware, conscious of it.
Mind-less integration to life
The mind is an interesting “phenomena.” It is able to add creativity to our lives. It is able to take us on a fantastic trip away from the mundane… The mind is the inventor of duality in our lives.
One of the most deceitful aspects of the mind, is the belief that life follows the same “rules” that we understand or that we expect.
Is the mind “good or bad”? 🙂
By now, that question should be out of the question…I hope.
Anything in the realm of the mind is not absolute. The mind merely interprets “reality” based on what we already know.
That is why to integrate with life, we may need to put aside all of those learned things that we may take as “truth.”
The above is not easy, but could be necessary to integrate with life.
We have learned about “stats” and “rivals”… Our thought has been trained to perceive confrontation, separation, analysis and logic as the way to perceive “truth,” nevertheless in a situation out of social context, (“real” life) things do not work, as we may believe.
Let us review the “process.”
We are aware. We are in this beautiful world.
How did we get stuck in the idea of “attaining something” or “achieving something” in life? How did we get stuck in fearing to “go away” from this experience to the point of becoming sad and suffer for what is a natural process?
How did we get stuck in the game of questions and answers such as : How did I get here? What is the purpose of being here? What happens after being here? etc. 🙂
Do we see that by “doing” all of those things we are missing the experience of enjoyment of “what is” and thus , integrating with “what is” for the sake of cluttering our minds with beliefs about something which does not relate with the experience of living “now”?
That is called to live life only with our heads and forgetting the heart.
The heart feels. We feel life.
If we talk to a person, do we think: How is that person going to take advantage of me? Or what could be her ulterior motive? Do we fantasize about those “if” scenarios which only exist because we are giving life to them in our heads?
Do we want to think “logically” to untie all the knots, which have been tightly tied up in our minds?
That is why, we may need to get away from thinking. We may need to just look at things “empty minded,” to experience things without labels or judgments.
That is what is meant as “silence.” To silence the mind, not by the compulsion of “trying to do something to keep it quiet.”
That doesn’t work. That is violence.
The mind will keep itself quiet when our feelings with all their strength arrive, that is when we learn again to feel life rather than to “think about it.”
“I think I love you.”
Love is not thinking about it.
“I believe that this is the right procedure”
You may be wrong. Why don’t we give our intuition a chance, so it doesn’t get stale?
We live. Our minds are busy thinking. Those thoughts are taking us away from enjoyment of life.
Do we want to know the cause, the reason… do we want to know a solution, a ready-made recipe, a belief to explain the phenomena? Do we need to read more books to get the answer? 🙂
If we do, our thoughts will only make more thoughts in return… 🙂
Exploring the Depth of Living 