Heather reunited with her friend Lou after a long time. They were catching up with the stories of their lives.
Heather: “ I remembered that you mentioned at one time about the importance of detachment, I understood that intellectually but it is so hard to put it in practice… That has been my recent experience in a relationship.”
Lou: “Intellectual understanding is the key to open the door to a spiritual “concept” such as detachment. The door could be open, but unless you are willing to enter to another room through your own steps out of your comfort zone, that intellectual understanding will not be practical. It will be just another piece of theory.”
We have listened to so much “stuff” about how to become “better,” “more spiritual,” free from sorrow, a “holy man,” etc.
Why is it that all that “knowledge” does not sit into our psyche? 😉
Because the issue relates with our feelings, to heal our emotions and not our logical, reasonable self.
Our society is great about giving “tips from the top” on how to change our behavior but there is nothing shared that could change the way we feel and perceive the world, that is our attitude in life is unchanged by intellectual stuff.
If the above does not make any sense yet, perhaps this quote will:
“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone” by Neale Donald Walsch.
Mathias, the wise tree; was chatting with Ananda in a sunny afternoon:
“Friend, you are living in your comfort zone trying to entertain yourself with many things and avoiding the experiences that you need to grow.”
Ananda did not quite understand what Mathias meant until the bumper sticker “Life begins at the end of your comfort zone” magically appeared in front of him.
Below is the video:[http://youtu.be/wQzDFjWPyf8]
As we could see, life has already in store the experiences necessary for us to grow. We could recognize the calling through different means.
They will appear… and we may avoid them.
Nevertheless, once we “get used to” a particular life style, that becomes our “comfort zone.” That is, we know one side of the spectrum of experiences, BUT we may need to know the other as well.
For example, to live in solitude, alone is a great experience. To get there after being used to living with lots of people around, could be “hell on Earth” until we get used to it… Then, that getting used to it, becomes our “comfort zone,” that is the time to move on again, so growth could happen.
Why that growth did not happen the first time around?
Because the range of experience wasn’t complete. Knowing first hand loneliness, will enrich a relationship with different people as long as we are not “escaping” from one experience to get into something else.
Of course, this is just an example. I am not advocating that is necessary to live alone before living with others. Everyone has the experiences needed in life.
Avyakt7 only shares his experiences.
Living in your comfort zone could be monotonous. “The same old thing.”
Life begins at the end of it.
To remain undivided in life means to stop analyzing, dividing things, separating things with our minds.
That oneness is very simple. Nevertheless, that “oneness” as just an idea becomes an intellectual theory without insight. That “ intellectual oneness” has been marketed as another belief, another idea, another philosophy, another religion.
For any “learned individual” all is about gaining information. “Information is power,” they may say. In the spiritual realm, “information” is meaningless to experience a different realm of consciousness.
Without a “different” consciousness; our ability to see and experience becomes trapped in the setting of the “average guy.”
That is the guy surviving on TV; movies; his “own” business, the “news,” books, Cds, the internet, the latest research, the talk by Mr. politician; the class by Dr. Ph.D. ; M.D or the priest … That is the guy who only absorbs and “regurgitates” information he heard/read someplace; that person is there to “take from the outside and repeat it,” that is the person who is truly sleeping even though moving and breathing in the world; that sort of consciousness is easy to manipulate and “brain wash” with the “latest” information.
None of the above is “bad.” However, a person totally immersed in the above characteristics does not have inside him the “guts” to undergo a total change in personality.
Because that person is “sleeping.” That person does not have the capacity to look at himself and the things he does everyday automatically, without noticing. That person has no developed inner observation.
Please see that this is not a religious belief.
That person could be a great critic or commentator of “outside” reality. That person could write or talk with great ease, by using logic and reasoning…. But that person does not have the capacity to look inside; where there is no fluency in language or “powerful” writing that could help.
If someone asks me what is the single most important experience to start transforming the self; my answer without a doubt is the feeling of being alone.
This is the time when we could face ourselves as we truly are without any of the distractions that we are accustomed to.
Alone. By yourself. No family, No friends. No religious group to support you. Nothing.
That could be a good setting to start, if we can handle it.
If we survive the experience, then we will recognize what ego is all about at different levels. That “self” looking for different ways to survive or to live through others; looking to please others just to be accepted. That ego/sense of self begging for some sort of company to be busy with; something or someone to posses, something to call “ours,” something to fill the void, the empty sensation of existing with nothing permanent, but worries about ceasing to exist.
Here is when the “I” will look for certainty, for security in the afterlife, with God; “His protection” with a religious group; with someone as long as that pain of inner emptiness is mitigated.
A hopeless day yells
for a bright sunny sky,
this loneliness is dry
turning my heaven into hell
After that hell; the light… then the discovery that no one is ever alone appears in the experience of your own company. Then, a bright sunny sky comes in your life despite the ups and downs of the weather of life.
Everything was just a bunch of thoughts, and those moments of feeling loneliness only brought the key to experience the inner self.
Many throw that key away as soon as possible. Few, will use that key to open the door into themselves.
That is where everything starts. 🙂
Who is “the one” who is beyond duality, and experiences “non duality”? It is too a “separate thing/consciousness” isn’t it, or just a role? Check it… A “thing” that is conscious or not conscious of himself, that says or does not say “I”, is still of a separate discrete existence. Try biting your tongue, and experience how that extreme pain “is just a role”, playing through you. You will see how much you exist…even though to experience that pain is – “just a role after all” 🙂
Thank you for your comment. Avyakt7 wanted to put your comment here for the “benefit of all.”
Non duality is not an “experience” as when you “experience” duality.
In your understanding of non-duality, you are coming from your intellectual mind, your mental reasoning to get to certain conclusions. With that “tool” all there will be left are just concepts to mentally “understand.” If avyakt7 could put this issue in different words to be understood, “I “ would.
This is about observing it in “yourself.”
Try tickling your feet. Would this experience show you “how much you exist”? Why this pleasurable experience should be different from biting your tongue?
Non duality is not about not feeling pain or pleasure. It is about going beyond those dualities by fully accepting them as what they are: “experiences” without the labeling in our minds.
The issue is the mind. When we feel pleasure we would like to experience that again, we look forward to that experience again and in that selection, we reject experiencing pain. This is not intellectual. See it in yourself.
On the other hand when there is pain, we typically reject it. This does not mean that I don’t have to do anything to lessen it, such as taking medicine. We reject it in our minds as undesirable, then we create a psychological trauma on that experience which will increase into further rejection, fear.
Look at a 5-year-old baby. He can cry at one moment and laugh 2 minutes later with the same intensity. The baby is not thinking about the “painful experience,” or “holding grudges” against someone; otherwise he wouldn’t be able to laugh right away. He is not thinking about a “role” being played. That is to live in non-duality.
If the baby could reason about all the moments he already fell off while trying to walk, he wouldn’t be able to walk quickly for fear of crying when he hits the ground over and over in his attempt to walk… Being reasonable about the “future” of trying to learn to walk would be detrimental.
According to the interpretation of the Bible by some, Jesus/Christ knew beforehand that he was going to be crucified.
However, he lived life until that experience happened. He knew that Judas Iscariot was going to betray him; nevertheless; Jesus/ Christ lived life without grudges against him. He suffered when the time came and not in anticipation of knowing something. He was living in the moment, in non-duality.