Just like the word “energy,” when the word “feeling” is mentioned, that word can mean many things.
We feel pain. We feel love. We feel the breeze of the air. We feel anxiety. We feel cold. We feel fulfilled. All those “feelings” do not have anything in common. Some are related with physical senses, others with the mind and yet others are mostly subjective, according to personal experience such is the case with love or peace.
What do we mean when we say that we could relate with Life through feelings and not the mind?
That is a hard question to answer for it depends on our experience and observation of the mind. Most humans at this time, are completely plugged in with their minds, completely identified with it as “I,” thus Life will be only experienced through their mind.
Therefore, someone who only “knows” and experiences Life through ideals, definitions, explanations and concepts, is not able to feel in Life, for feeling is not of the mind.
Some have made a separation between the mind and the “heart,” identifying the heart as the center of feelings. However, this has brought further misunderstanding, as many think the heart is a romantic place left for artists, which is disconnected from ‘reality.’
There is the feeling of emotions which is the typical center of perception of artists, and there is the feeling of sentiments, which are not part of duality. In short, an emotion is duality a sentiment is not.
When we look at the innocent face of a baby or when we reconnect with someone who we haven’t seen for a long time, there is an unrehearsed “feeling” which will feed us, that is we will feel “good” and wholesome for a moment until the mind appears with thoughts and inner chatter. That sensation which is unexpected, legitimately unrehearsed could be a description of a feeling.
Why is it so important to feel? Because fulfillment in Life is through feeling. The mind is not capable of being fulfilled. Humans are looking for fulfillment in Life. That is the basic premise of living.
Our actions, our responses are utterly conditioned. “Hi! How u doing? Good? Great! Good to see ya!” For most that common interaction is completely coming from the mind. Typically, we do not mean what we say but it is a rehearsed, accepted, socially correct and desired behavior.
Feeling through sentiments brings calmness, well being in connecting with another and Life.
We may need to be aware of this to reduce the influence of the mind, for otherwise; we may live a completely unfulfilled life. Although we may have accomplished many things in society, our minds will not allow us to sense fulfillment. The mind is driven to go for more. To accomplish the ultimate experience, believing that once we arrive there, then we will be happy. But that time never arrives, and that is a blessing for an overworked mind, for otherwise a mental breakdown may appear. “I arrived but it is not as I thought. I wasted my Life. I ‘feel’ empty handed.”
Another name for “feeling” could be “No-mind.” When there is an experience of no-mind, the “problems” created by our minds are not. Thus, we can observe with freshness and without the filter, or veil of worries and unfulfilled wishes. Through no-mind, the fulfillment of the moment (now) has satisfaction, while our anxiety for “solutions” in the mind world remains. Observing that contrast will show us our path.
Reasoning kills our feelings. Have we observed that?
There is a significant amount of information dealing on how to control thoughts, negative thoughts, destructive thoughts, etc. It is conspicuous, that most individuals are dealing in one way or another with mental issues.
There was one talk I heard on “Youtube” promising to stop negative thoughts by using a simple “technique,” a “method of self-inquiry” easy to remember.
These talks or books on controlling the mind have “methods,” “techniques,” which are mind constructs. In simple words: Stop your mind by using your mind. It is the battle of dividing the mind into two sides, the “good” controlling mind over the “bad” misbehaving one. Is that fictitious division possible? Only in our minds.
Perhaps many individuals are interested in “easy methods” to stop even for a little while their abusive minds. Yes, we can force ourselves to “remember” something such as a mantra, a phrase, even “God,” and experience that our rush of thoughts, have diminished or stopped. However, such person still has mental issues, those are still unchanged. The mind represented by the “I” is being forced to comply to what it has established itself to be “good,” desirable.
I find the same “methodology,” when men are looking to “improve” their sex performance (last longer.) They may find information in the Taoist tradition or in Tantra; but many are not interested in exploring the extent of those traditions; they just want the “method,” the “technique” for sex right away. That is another characteristic of an ill mind: Forget the process and cut to the bone, for “I” want results now; whereas Life works through gradual natural changes.
Nevertheless, the “I” has found a problem and wants the “solution” now. This practice of forcing an outcome in ourselves without looking at the big picture, is detrimental to our well being.
What is the “big picture”? The mind and sexuality are not isolated manifestations in a human being, there is interrelation. Those changes happen according to the level of consciousness of an individual, what he IS. Those are mere consequences of BEING something thanks to psychological traumas, repressions and violence as such; any self-study, any self-observation and acknowledgement of the whole human experience will bring change.
Otherwise; individuals may find a temporary solution but that is a bandage in a deep wound. Can a disturbed mind find a solution by using that same mind? No.
How not to use the mind then? That question may change our approach. Let us meet Awareness. There is not much that I can say about it, or to define it, but we could try a brief description.
When we become conscious on how our mind moves, what triggers it and how the mind relates with emotions and feelings. Those are “steps” in awareness.
Most do not want to bother with this self-study, but rather want for someone to give them the “answer,” the “technique,” the “method” and follow it, hoping to “solve” the particular issue. At least, that is the theory.
The mind is not an object to be defined. There is nothing concrete about the mind other than the fact that we experience it on a daily basis. I could read a self-help book on how someone dealt with his ill mind, but there are many blanks in that explanation that we will need to discover ourselves. Self-awareness, observation are the main “tools” for that. There are no shortcuts when dealing with our inner world.
If we are not aware, we will totally identify with the contents of the mind, going from “my” mind to finally completely identifying with it, and saying: “I.” It is that small step in identification, the one offering more problems to us.
In my own experience, the best setting to start our own mind observation is Nature. We may need the supporting environment and sensory upliftment brought by Nature. Outside the world of “progress and madness,” we could take our minds away from its dull, repetitive environment and that newness will allow us to sense better what is going on.
Emotions are expressed in our bodies but the mind triggers the recognition; thus emotions are strongly related with the mind. However, feelings are pretty distinct. Take the feeling of joy or peace. Those are states of BEING which are not necessarily related with the mind.
It is in the experience of feelings how the mind could be recognized and left aside.
I discovered benefit in listening to music without lyrics, instrumental music.
That will bring feelings. The mind has no opportunity to enter in the appreciation of music unless we compare, or if we try to explain or describe the sounds through words. Lyrics in music will bring words and consequently, the mind.
Most are so disconnected with actual feeling, believing that they are feeling when in fact it is the mind processing words and describing a feeling to itself to make us believe that we feel. The well known phrase: “I THINK I love you,” speaks for itself. How is love related with thinking? Can the mind ever know what love, a feeling is?
Reasoning kills our feelings. Thus, the mind kills our feelings. Without being able to feel; there is no opportunity to go beyond the mind.
A human being is surrounded by fields of distinct “energies.” I wish there was another word to describe the subtle which is in constant movement, whose influence is always there even though few can perceive them. “Energy” has a physical connotation. “The capacity to do work” it is said; but that has nothing to do with the subtle fields. Thus, I would use the word “subtle energy” to refer to this.
Why is this subtle? Because it is imperceptible for many.
“Spirituality” received its “way out there” stereotype when referring about things which couldn’t be proven to exist. Economics are proven to exist even though artificially created, but subtle energies cannot be proven for not everyone is capable to tune into them.
Why is there some who could perceive subtle energies and others cannot?
That is a matter of sensibility. In some countries, megaphones are used to sell fruits, vegetables an widgets; although, there is a law prohibiting annoying noises, the law is seldom enforced for the majority of individuals out of “convenience” (laziness,) would prefer to buy from these people as they drive by their homes. These “buyers” are used to great noise. It doesn’t bother them. Nevertheless, their sensibility to more sophisticated and educated ways to hear, will suffer. The same example holds true with the perception of subtle energies.
If we take care of our mental, physical and emotional health; then our odds to FEEL subtle energies will increase. The recipe of “wholesome health” has been provided by many systems, religions and philosophies; however, our society does not support “wholesome” but the opposite through unhealthy practices in the name of “improving the economy,” which I will not discuss here but I am sure, many are aware of.
Few individuals will gain sensibility.
Those with the ability to FEEL, are better equipped to understand how these subtle energies influence the behavior of human beings.
FEELING is a subjective “proof” until the collective consciousness agrees. We could feel emotions, feelings, subtle energies, which will give us a different picture and explanation than the one offered by reason and logic alone based on the perception of the “normal” senses.
Consider this: Life is on the side of FEELINGS. Our society values reason and logic alone. The outcome of FEELING Life is fulfillment. The outcome of reason and logic alone is to “be right.”
There is a huge difference. To “be right” doesn’t give fulfillment, ego perhaps and fear but we don’t feel lively, at peace which is what FEELING does.
Love, harmony, peace are felt not reasoned or thought out. There is no thinking involved. Do we see the issue? Reasoning kills our feelings. Our society mostly lives in the head. Thinking, reasoning, analysis, logic, etc. all of that is highly valued, but we cannot FEEL.
Have we ever seen someone playing a musical instrument by memory? (funny, we say by “heart”) That person knows the structure, the notes, the timing; but there is no music in what he plays. Unless, he puts his FEELING there.
What do we value in Life? The economy, the market, the six figures job, income…. All mind. Nothing wrong with that; but we cannot be fulfilled in Life because the mind knows no satisfaction. It is always looking for what is next, in the future or remembering the past. The mind cannot be in the “now.” The mind sings “I can’t get no (satisfaction).”
Life is balance and the new challenge in society is to put the mind in its “right” place which is behind FEELINGS, that is if we are interested in encouraging a wholesome human being who experiences love, peace and harmony. That human will be able to FEEL what most cannot at this time. On the other hand, a highly effective human taught to add and subtract like a computer and to calculate his movements as to avoid making “mistakes,” will not know what is like to FEEL fulfillment in his Life.
By feeling the outer subtle energies we could perceive how these will affect others and the self. By feeling the inner world we could know our intentions.
Why is that important?
I will be succinct. The “choice” is fear or fulfillment. Put your mind in the accumulation of things, add “gifts” to your personality to become “better” than others, to “succeed” in Life; fear of losing those things is unavoidable. The mind believes in “improving,” but that improvement is only accumulation. It is building the outer layers of the self. Here is the catch. Spiritual “improvement” does not come out of accumulation but in diminishing the outer layers to go into the root of the onion. Thus, when we go over the fear of losing, we gain.
How can we go over fear of losing unless we experience what is like to lose?
That requires a logical, reasonable answer from the mind. 🙂
Finding “good” in apparently “bad,” is one of the trademarks of a spiritual person. If we look at the symbol of “yin -yang,” (duality) we will see that one side whether black or white, has a little “eye” with opposite color. Therefore, we can “select” to focus on the positive side of an apparent negative situation.
The above is not a “trick” or a “method.” It is simply the recognition through observation of Life. Where we focus, our attention is. That is what becomes “real.”
A person changing through the process of self-realization without a doubt, has experienced a lockdown period in his own Life. It is necessary to process all the inner changes.
Thus, those who are ready to take advantage of this situation, will use time to be completely observant of his own mind.
The mind is very important, for that is the filter to watch and to interpret what we consider “reality.” Observe how the mind will introduce desires in unexpected ways. The mind is eager of constant movement. It wants to be continuously stimulated.
Observing means merely to watch as if we are watching a TV program. The minute we are able to do this without engaging our beliefs, judgments or emotional responses, then we are getting to know what Observation is.
The previous teaching was to change a “bad” thought with a “good” thought. Although that is typical material for a “best-seller;” we are not realizing that this practice only engages more the mind to make such change. The mind sees itself as thinking something “bad.” The mind judges that “it cannot be. I am good. I want good thoughts.” So, the mind changes by picking a thought and label that as “good.” In this exercise, we have given further nourishment to the needed stimulation of the mind.
As long as there is inner chattering, there cannot be observation. When we bypass the mind, we will know no-mind. However, this is not a goal to be achieved. It just happens.
The mind creates a “reality” which is not necessarily there. We need to recall that our focus will dictate what we perceive.
On the other hand, most individuals unaware of the above; are only concerned on distracting their minds. Nothing wrong with that. Just be AWARE that this is happening while it is happening. Many providers are streaming hours of entertainment to “help others cope with stressful times.” Then, their minds will fantasize about the future on and off. The antenna of their minds will pick up the collective vibe of distress, uncertainty and nuisance of having to stay home. In turn that will give them a certain mood, which goes unperceived; so they may call that “my mood.” In extreme cases, a pill will be taken to be able to sleep and send the overworked mind to rest.
It is important to learn to observe in order to pick up the messages and the conditions of the outside which may affect the “inside.”
The mind could be our greatest friend or enemy. It is a tool and as such, we have the opportunity now when we could be out of our “normal” busy schedule, to learn from it.
Without a doubt, a step forward is when we clearly perceive that “I” am not the mind. The tool is not “me.” That is a fantastic Aha! moment.
The mind is a repository of information, memories. It is almost like a hard drive, being filled with videos (MP4) of our recorded life experiences, with the additional “feature” of being able to extrapolate assumptions based on the stored information. However, some information “leaks” as years go by. It is unreliable.
A “normal” person will use those memories and information as a source of “knowledge” and apply it to unknown situations, by assuming that existing trends or past life experiences, will continue as they had. We use Life experiences, the past; to forecast the future and new situations. We can label that as “ thinking” or “reasoning” and feel safe; but notice that this process is as good as flipping a coin to make a “choice,” for truly Life is completely unexpected. The threads of Life situations escape our mental perception.
A person living in the “mind,” will believe that “he” (“I”) is the mind. When Life throws something “new,” then the mind will retrieve information and use that info as bona fide source of action.
Trusting only the contents of the mind is a superficial way to meet Life. There are 2 or more paths opening in our Life at the same time, which one do we follow? That could be a hard “decision.” We have been taught to weigh the “pros” against the “cons.” We are merely speculating. We don’t know. What is perceived as “bad” could be necessary in our Life path in order to grow; but our “reason” may not see that.
Thus, we can flip a coin and odds are the same as “thinking through it.” However, we will be hesitant to do it, for “thinking” gives the false sensation of having some control over circumstances. We are great believers of the mind.
The mind is a static mechanism meant to recall past experiences. There is no creativity in it. Through it we only perpetuate the “same old thing.” That is the false sensation of security that we embrace.
The mind wishes to understand Life. How could it be? A “machine” built to keep, process and understand only pictures and data will feel intimidated when a “real” movie of Life is in front. The mind takes a picture, analyzes it, dissects it and comes up with some theory as to how the next movie frame “should be.” Otherwise, it gets a disappointing feeling, even a bitter taste: A trauma is made. However if the forecast happens, then ego pops up until the upcoming “failure” brings it down.
Ironically and philosophically, we may conclude that “Life is a bitch and then we die.”
Understanding Life through the mind is futile. A picture cannot explain the movie. We are spinning our wheels without moving an inch. Life is not meant to be mentally understood but lived. Living is not of the mind, but we assimilate the experience by being observant, quiet which is the way to learn, without making mental conclusions and theories.
When we talk to someone we may hear words and only believe what comes out of her mouth. Those who have a bit more observation, know that the overall feeling, gestures and setting will give a better clue. That “knowing” cannot be put in a book in easy to understand “fool-proof ”steps for everyone to read and “apply.” That “knowing” is more accurate as it fits “reality.”
Tantra moves along those lines. It is the invitation to abandon the mind and its understanding, its signals; which only makes our moves in Life through the path of stored fears. Very predictable, that is lacking creativity.
The very wish to understand Life through the mind, creates the motion of our minds over our hearts.
We will not dare to OBSERVE the movie of ourselves quietly, while moving in Life. We will be content with a “selfie” and hang on to some belief about that picture, which at the end will be shattered when Life moves beyond that point.
Paradoxically, Life is understood without trying to understand it. That may be the only requisite. That understanding is not of the mind; thus, closer to “what is.”
Within the words “reason and logic” our society has built its own way of looking and understanding the world. We say “the world around us” but it is truly within us.
The following has been taught and accepted by the great majority:
“There is good and bad. The “good” needs to prevail over the “bad.” We should strive to become good and eliminate evil completely.”
Most “normal” people will agree with that. After all, it is “logical,” “reasonable;” in a world where good and evil exists, one side has to fight the other and “win.” A logical, but violent deduction from a conditioned mind.
99% of movies, are made to fit that paradigm. We are fed with that idea day and night.
Traditional medicine, observes that paradigm as well. “The body fights against pathogens which are the cause of diseases.” That is the belief. Since pathogens are spread out like soldiers, traditional medicine will send a drug (an internal atomic bomb) to destroy “everything,” the pathogens and the defense mechanisms of the body included. Never mind any side effects and complications.
A person may have deep emotional issues or he may be negligent by eating traditional “fast food” on a regular basis; but we only see bacteria as the logical cause of the disease and we need to fight and “win.”
There are many more examples where the mindset of “us” against “them,” prevails.
Do we see the consequences of that limited view of Life? We have been conditioned to fight as a way of living.
Is a “reasonable” explanation enough to gain our belief? The worship of that little word “reason” is truly limiting our understanding of Life. I am not speaking about society with its “reasons.” I am speaking about Life.
Life is birth and death. Life is ups and downs. Life is our ability to enjoy and to mourn. Life is that empty sensation yearning to be filled with some meaning while still alive. We fill that with beliefs trying to convince ourselves that we are on the “right” track.
In the following ending paragraphs, lies my legacy to the “spiritually minded” future generations:
Life cannot be understood by the mind.
Good and bad are not separated.
A theist and an atheist are walking the same path.
Politics is violence.
What we were taught to believe and take as facts, are not the “truth” we thought they were. Go beyond beliefs. Find out for yourself.
Waking up from the dreamy world hasn’t been easy, but when it is our time; there is nothing we can do about it … but open our eyes.
Will resume writing on January 9, 2020.
Best wishes for the new year! 🙂
We are never the same. There is no static moment, no past where we could look back and believe to be completely unchanged since then.
I observed some family members visiting us. They live in another country. The last family gathering was about 20 years ago. Now, they ARE different from what I knew before. It is not just looks. That is the most superficial aspect of change. They are different, “I” am different.
I had an image of them in my mind. That image created an expectation, which resulted in illusion.
The only thing without a change that I knew from before, was their names. The same outcome occurs when we are living closely with others, although we may not realize the changes.
As we grow in relationship with others, we change. An individual is affected by company. Most are aware of that.
Most are oblivious that as we grow older, our own changes will create an inner resistance, when we are aware of them. There is an image, a still picture of the “perfect” self, which we would like to keep.
That “poster” is living in the mind. As any poster, it is static, completely unchanged. It is not real.
Nevertheless, that is our point of inner comparison. Comparison is the mother of unhappiness, at any level.
Practically, we live to keep an image and we relate with our own images of others.
“Pat” has an image of “Carl.” There is “Carl’s image” as perceived by Carl himself.
Carl would like to be treated according to the image that he has of himself. Anything lower than that, is considered an insult. Pat will mingle with Carl, by using the image that she has of Carl. Those are the untold boundaries.
Typically, when we meet someone for the first time, we spend that meeting in creating an image of that person. If we like that person, then the image grows in accolades, until one day we may “realize” and say to her: “You have changed since I first met you.”
It could be many years before we awaken from the dream.
Similarly if we dislike a person. Our image about that person can only go down, as we strive for consistency. “We cannot be wrong.” Observe the inner game of placing images into simple containers of likes and dislikes and to consider those as the standards of accuracy, reality, etc.
Could we relate without images?
That may require great awareness of the tricks of our own minds.
To meet someone without “pictures and posters” in our minds, will allow that other person to BE, for there is no inner need for the other to comply with our own picture of expectations, requirements and ideals.
For that we need to be free from psychological neediness, at any level in regards to the other. If there is a need, there will be a picture and our desire to maintain that picture as the ideal. Consciously or unconsciously, we will manipulate “reality” to look like that picture.
Psychological neediness does not allow for a “true,” open, caring relationship; for we are concerned in keeping the validity of personal images, rather than becoming aware of and accepting unconditionally “what is.”
Will be taking a break until October 31st. Enjoy yourself! 🙂