Tagged: relationship

Relationships in Life

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When we become trapped in labels and traditions from society, we may not be able to listen to our inner voice based on an indisputable feeling, which will let us know the way we should act in life.

Ananda does not feel the same feelings for his family members as his sister Raysha does.

Even though Ananda had mostly a good relationship with his parents; the feeling is not as strong as it could be for Raysha.

Ananda asked Mathias, the wise tree about that.
Mathias responded: “Raysha is related with both family trees; your father and your mother.
You Ananda… you are related through them indirectly, through Raysha.”

Ananda then asked: “Which one is my direct family link?”
Mathias responded: “The Universe.” 🙂

Obviously, there is information that has value at a particular point in time. Knowing what is Ananda’s direct family link will be only intellectual information at this point. That is of no consequence.

Mathias also added: “Raysha will have feelings of motherhood towards her father who is almost ready to depart into another experience. Raysha had been her mother in another life.”

Then, Mr. Intellectual and Mrs. Devotional come into the picture:
“ But … that is not logical… That is nonsense.
If you are the daughter how could you be the mother at the same time? “
“My belief is that this is the only lifetime and then you either go to hell or heaven. There is only one life according to the Holy book written by God.”

Feelings don’t lie.

As we learn to observe all the labels that we use to categorize people into brothers, sisters, aunts, etc. Those categories already define the type of relationship that we are allowed to have now.
That is neither “good nor bad.” Our feelings and not our thoughts are the catalyst for action or reaction, that is why it becomes important to know ourselves by acknowledging our emotions first, to find our feelings.

Sometimes, we may meet someone that we would like to get to know better in a relationship, just to find out that “she feels like a daughter.” What do you do?
Do you rationalize that experience as: “ That is nonsense. She is not your daughter.”

The feeling will not go away, could you get married with your daughter? 🙂
Honesty is not just a word.

Life has many “spider webs” which will connect us in different ways and at different times. That is, what you feel very strong about today may not be later on; (that is why dogmas are necessary to keep the same thing in our awareness) the interesting challenge is to learn to act according to the present time, by respecting the whole experience, the circumstances, the individuals involved and our feelings as well.

That comes with growth in life.
Life is truly a teacher.

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The “morality” of ego

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When “I” started to have problems within, that was the time when those problems manifested “out there” as “I” will relate with “others” all the time.

Dealing with “others” is what we call to have a relationship.
Nowadays, it is an ego-based relationship.

The most external view of a relationship is observed on how “Jack deals with Jill” everyday.

Jack is like this. Jill is like that. Obviously issues will come up between them.

Could we fix those issues?
Maybe. 🙂
We could create a “code of conduct.” Something delineated so Jack could know that he is “going over the border” and Jill could feel safe from a harsh interaction.

Moreover, we could make that code of conduct into a moral standard and just to add holiness into it, we could say that those are God’s “rules.”

Jack: “You have parked in my parking spot.”
Jill: “ That is not my car.”
Jack: “ Do you know who that may be then?”
Jill: “It is not my problem.”

How could Jack react to “win the fight”? What he could say?

Without any “moral codes,” Jack could insult Jill or even do more than that… Jack could unleash his own “Satan” from deep inside.. 🙂
But, with a “moral code,” Jack will think twice before he reacts harshly.

Jack thought within a second: “Uhhm… I feel like beating her up. No one dares to talk to “me” like that! I just asked her a simple question! But, I was taught to love my neighbor and to give “the other cheek” in cases like this for if “I” do something wrong, “I” may get punished by God. I could be damned forever…If i give the other cheek, I may earn Paradise…What a test paper!”

Jack learns to repress. Nevertheless, Jack could use that incident as an example of how wonderfully he is “transforming.”

He is giving the other cheek. Jack has remained “silent” even though he was verbally attacked…. Hallelujah!

In another consciousness, all issues start with oneself and finish right there.

Jack to cashier at store: “ You must be new here…”
Cashier: “No I have been here for 2 years.”
Jack: “ I don’t recall seeing you before…”
Cashier (getting a little upset): “Either I am not here when you come here or you don’t pay attention when you come.”
Jack (feeling the “ego” distress from the cashier): Yeah, that must be it. I typically don’t pay attention…
Cashier: 🙂 smile…
Jack: Have a great day!

Jack didn’t react. Jack didn’t think about “becoming good.” Jack didn’t follow any code of conduct.
Jack was empty of “self.”

The cashier smiled. She was happy. Jack was smiling. The “ego” door was open. Everything went through it.

Walking around with a defined personality does not allow someone to blend according to the circumstances. That “blending” does not require thinking. It just requires intuition.

A “moral” person is truly someone without ego. Otherwise, the “moral codes” surrounding an ego-driven personality will only enhance and protect ego.

That “morality” becomes a serious “immorality” in the long run.

On Love in Valentine’s day!

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We are love undisguised as a feeling of openness to life. As human beings, we could manifest this feeling to all creation as well as to particular individuals. There is no limit but the one imposed by our own minds.

In every human being there is the dichotomy of individuality with belonging to the totality of life.
Thus, love could manifest in both ways.

There is love to individuals, which is known by most people. In that, love is about a particular relationship with that “special” one.
In life, there is “uniqueness,” but to be “special” means to bring the knife which separates that “special” one from those who are not.

That “special” one could have many names. Some even use the name of God.

To experience “uniqueness,” brings the door of openness to life,
that is not to be attached to a particular knife!

In a loving relationship, we could learn about the game of “yin and yang.”
When we learn about duality, we could learn about life.

Male and Female are different polarities which are meant to complement each other.
To complement is to love.
That is a hard lesson to learn!

For most, a relationship with someone means to dominate, to possess, even to compromise.
Little is known that our mental separation of “you” and “me” gets in between.
Then, the feeling and the expression of that feeling becomes incomplete, unfulfilling.

Even love between individuals is meant to be the One!

“It takes 2 to tango.” We learn about a dance… by dancing.
That is the journey, the path… to find out that 2 dancers could become one!

This mental ideal, “utopia” may be hard to find, for to give love means to experience that which we are!
We could only give what we have.
We could only have what we are. 🙂

Love life, express those feelings.
Give, that is share yourself, don’t be afraid!

God is with you, when you are with Him.
That is, when you are love within!

Cleaning our Aura and Chakras

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The other day, Avyakt7 spoke with a friend about chakras, auras and cleaning them. Perhaps it is a good time to share this in the blog.
In the world of Spirituality there is inner transformation. That comes about through different paths of self-purification, that is a catharsis. That transformation is always in relationship with everything. It cannot be a secluded event.

Because we are part of the environment, we belong to it (Totality) whatever is going on outside will be “ingested” by us by default. Many times what you feel as coming from you (a mood, a bothersome something) is not “you” but what you have “ingested” through living life.

A child needs to play. Playing means to get dirty in the mud sometimes. For many, the answer to that issue is “never play outside so you don’t get dirty.” For the spiritual walker, once there is the experience of being clean; then it is easy to recognize once there is “dirt” around our aura.

Taking benefit of the healing rays of the Sun is another example. There are times and occasions when this will be very helpful. Our cell pores will open up and our being will “ingest” that energy. Nevertheless, there are some other times when the atmosphere is charged with toxics, or the timing is not the right one and it is very hot or very cold. Obviously that could only hurt us. Here is when wisdom to choose comes.

“Never get a Sun-tan” is not the answer. 🙂

Similarly with our subtle body or aura or whatever label you care to call it.

The chakras are points where we have energetic openings, that is when the “inside” is in relationship with the “outside.” That is why, it is pointless to just talk about our own individuality when there is a continuous relationship with everything.

When those energetic openings are obstructed due to an emotional issue or due to the toxic surroundings, that will affect our bodies and will manifest as a disease.

For example, the throat chakra is related with the second chakra (emotions) someone who represses a particular emotion related with the second chakra, will feel a problem with the corresponding organ in that location or even with the throat.
Similarly the heart chakra is related with the third chakra (stomach.)

Thus the answer is not to “avoid doing things” but to be conscious of our interactions with everything and “clean ourselves.”

Cleaning the chakras could be accomplished in many ways and it is an individual option as to what works for you.

For some it may be to take a shower with marine salt added.

For others it is the Ocean. Going for a swim…. Or the sand…. to bury your belly in the sand … for others it will be to use rocks or gems which will have a cleaning outcome, “alignment” etc. As you can see, it is about keeping in contact with Nature and the elements, that is with the totality of life.

This “subtle energetic shower” which will keep us clean from the outside “dirt” is necessary to be able to have our energetic openings healthy and in that way our mood will improve.

There is so much that Nature could offer us to heal ourselves! I would invite you to explore this.
Now that we are aware that we are continually in relationship with everything around us, we could “choose” according to what we see will fit us best.

The above is not a religion or a “New age” practice. It is part of being aware beyond our own individuality. It is the practical aspect of spirituality.

I want someone like ME

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A Spiritual aware individual will take the opportunity to experience a relationship as a way to know himself.

Life is a relationship. That relationship could be viewed in different ways, as plentiful as the people on Earth. Only our beliefs will put an end to that diversity.

When a relationship is taken to the personal level, the opportunity to see those unknown “issues” in us popping out like hot pop corn, is there.

Unfortunately, for most it is not about seeing ourselves through the reflection of others, but is the game on how to change someone else, how to manipulate someone else to fit our standards; that is how to make someone an extension of “me.”

“I want someone who has the same qualities as me…how lucky they are!”

The game is about becoming like the other. Whoever is dominant, wins.

This game creates expectations, which will backfire the “players.” Those expectations are translated into feeling hurt, feeling deceived, feeling betrayed.

As long as our emotional health depends on another to give our life some sort of meaning, we cannot be free to enjoy life. There cannot be enjoyment but dependency.

It is the game of the “master and slave.” The pleasure of the master resides on the existence of a slave. A slave, wishing to be free, will suffer until he gets out completely from the claws of the master. Wishing, longing to be free is just part of the game of still being a slave. Part of the emotional drama, which makes some individuals alive…even when experiencing suffering.

A relationship of that kind could be labeled as “love.” But it is far from that. It is called a symbiosis.

Symbiosis is what many relationships are nowadays. Nothing wrong with that, for it is in “fashion…”!

Once we realize about that symbiosis, we may want to change it…. that is when “problems” start…
The expectations to demand attention, the rules, the regulations spoken or not; and the game of blaming the “other” is then played. The “winner” is the one who collects more “evidence.” 🙂

Some like flattery, praise, and adulation. They will readily take it and believe it. It is about building up an image. Nevertheless, belittlement, condemnation, insult and offense will not be far behind, the opposites are always shadowing each other.

It is fascinating to watch what comes out of us when in relationship with others. If we like what comes out, we found a trigger which has the same potential to bring rejection in us.
Like it or not, is the same thing… Please explore this sentence.

We can learn many things about ourselves by being with people who are not like us.
For the “normal” individual looking for “ another Me,” that is something unheard of.

For an aware individual, it is the golden chance to learn… and go beyond “me.”

Caught up in feelings to “feel” Spirituality

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“The beauty of your celestial face
shines in the softness of your skin
that is your everlasting grace
which makes us lovers akin

Mystery is your Divine name
your beauty is worth a golden frame,
to me there is nothing but your heart
that is what keeps our passion alive.”

The above piece (written sometime ago and re-arranged) may bring certain feelings. It may bring a closeness to an ideal, an experience, a wish, a desire.

In feelings, we can open a different world of experiences. We could be finally “alive.”

In Spirituality, God has taken that pedestal of perfection, of totality, of fulfillment.

A “lover pursuing the beloved” is the story of human beings looking to meet their complements for the experience of completeness.

Even though romantic feelings will take us away from the common “primal instincts” and put us into the plane of deep sentiments, closer to “real” spirituality; still there is the need to recognize that unless we are complete in ourselves; there cannot be the experience of two equals complementing each other in a “healthy” relationship.

If there is no “self completeness,” God is “up there” even though “here.”

That is what makes God unreachable. For the moment we could reach that equality in our beings; that is the moment where the need to feel fulfilled through another, magically dissapears.

Then, being “merged,” being equal, being complements, is the natural relation. Oneness.

Oneness starts with the Universe inside ourselves. When feelings and thoughts align in this Oneness; then there could be the opportunity to complement that oneness with a greater one… 🙂