Tagged: sexuality

Understanding of male sexuality- #2

What we ARE is the flavor that will be transmitted to others. What we DO does not bring flavor when our actions do not match who we ARE. 

For most, sexuality is about physical attraction or an opportunity. These individuals usually are not aware of energies. That is fine. For others sexuality is an expression and the physical goes along with emotional closeness, for there is energetical compatibility. That is fine too.

Let me illustrate: Most “normal” individuals will eat junk food in a heartbeat. These are not aware of the consequences that this will bring later on, but they enjoy the moment. Enjoyment is good! Junk food is many times, emotional  food. Others who are aware of natural food and the benefits of it, may not eat junk food. Junk food is naturally tasteless for them. They enjoy “healthy” food! Similarly, some may sleep with anyone in the name of “practicing” Tantra. Energetically junk food is OK for them. Others, may be more picky. All is good, according to our consciousness. But, if we crave junk food but repress it in the name of eating healthy, we may have created a problem for ourselves. Change from junk into healthy without repression, does not come solely through intellectual understanding. There has to be change of consciousness, otherwise; our repression will be hidden and growing.

Male ejaculation has become a “problem” nowadays, due to information shared by “masters.” We hear: Avoid ejaculation at all costs, that drains your energy. “Techniques” are sold for that, etc. If your BEING is not ready for that, it will be all about repression. Sex will not be enjoyable as a guilt trip is assured, if a “mistake” happens.  A “master” is not made out of “practice” alone. If there was only “practice” and “Technique” rest assured, that individual is not a “master.”

It is very important to know where we ARE at a particular point in time. To look at ourselves and observe if we are repressing or indulging to the point of draining ourselves. If we are in the middle, know that this “middle” will change in time. It is a game of balance. To gain that sense of balance, is very important in Life.
The mind likes to ask questions such as: How many times is it OK to ejaculate per month?
Please forget about that. Learn to feel. If you are aware of how you feel, you will know. “Listen to your body.” If we depleted our energy, there are visible consequences. Using “scientific help” will deplete more what we have left. Naturally, celibacy is helpful at that time to regenerate our energy.

We have made sexuality into a problem. Rather, look at ways to change, to become less rigid about ideas of what “should be.” As we learn to accept ourselves and love ourselves starting from our bodies and the appreciation of the different feelings/sensations that our bodies are capable of, we could be ready to experience our own meaning of human sexuality. It is our own path after all.

Some individuals have the capacity to enjoy sex tremendously. Others do not.  Once we realize that Life offers the whole range of experiences, then our labels of “good, bad, right , wrong” will be left aside. All it is needed from us at every moment, is to be completely honest with ourselves. This holds true with sexuality as with other aspects of Life.

We may need to remember that Life changes and so do we. It is natural. Only our minds will bind us to the way we were a few months ago. It is in that acceptance of change how a relationship could be built. Nevertheless, most are not ready for that. Most want certainty, security. These individuals demand that someone does not change throughout their lives… without a doubt, love cannot grow in that.
Love grows in uncertainty. That is the flavor of BEING.

Shall continue…

Understanding of male sexuality – #1

Even today, there is a complete misunderstanding of human sexuality.
There is very little conscious experience of male sexuality. This time, I will share in a series of articles.
What makes me an “expert”?
I had the “normal” consciousness at one time in my Life. Now, it is different. Out of that change of consciousness there are many other natural changes including a different perception, experience and understanding of sexuality. Throughout reading the many articles of this blog, many will realize what I am pointing out. It seems as if 2 different people were writing here, although; it was just “me.”

In our society there is a reaction towards male energy. That reaction has taken the collective consciousness to believe that female energy is what we need at this time. The typical misunderstanding has placed a woman as the centerpiece on some religions and even “Tantra” teachings today. Please be aware that female energy is genderless. A male could have a predominant female energy as well as a female, male energy. Misunderstanding upon misunderstanding based on “research” of “normal” typical individuals is not the basis of the belief that human sexuality is like that. There is more to it.

A woman cannot understand the experience of a male. Similarly the opposite. Between males (whether predominantly female or male energy,) there is an enormous range of experiences that are possible.

Nevertheless, a different type of sexuality beyond the “normal” kind based on the harmonious exchange of energy of 2 different poles (male/female) happens when human consciousness changes. When we ARE ready.
Without this inner change, we are left with “techniques” and “rituals,” this is the game of pretending to be something that we ARE not. Spirituality and Sexuality are based on consciousness. Conscious awareness of energy. However, most are stuck in the physical attributes.

Therefore, it only makes sense to acknowledge who we ARE at this time, to value who we ARE at this time, to love who we ARE at this time, for a natural change to occur, free of traumatic experiences.

Our society sells performance and to be “better” all the time, without realizing that they are sending the message that as we ARE, we ARE not enough. This game of a donkey striving to reach the invisible carrot does not allow us to enjoy that which IS, right NOW… before it changes naturally.

The above is the foundation for Tantra. Without it, we are just dealing with mind games, as “teachers” are merely taking advantage of human weaknesses by merely promoting to indulge in sex, to a sexually repressed and spiritually unfulfilled individual. That game could be dangerous.

Sexuality is energy. It is that type of energy the one capable of bringing different types of experiences to individuals. That energy flows naturally from the pelvic region to the forehead, however; most “normal” individuals are completely unaware of this for their subtle “pipes” (nadis) are not “clean” enough. When this energy flows, the state of elation and bliss could be maintained longer which translates to a fulfilled, revitalizing act. However, for most that upward path is “clogged up” as a pipe which does not allow for water to flow upwards. The consequence is the explosion of that pressure on the pelvic region. That is what is known as “normal” for most. The label used is “orgasm.”

I want to clean my “pipes.” How to DO it? What is the “technique”?
If you are asking those questions, there is no understanding of what I conveyed above.
Only sharing for the common good. 

We shall continue….

Homophobia

Life changes. What it was, it is not necessarily what is “now.”
If it IS, it has the right to BE.
That is the simple “law of Life.” To “comprehend” that beyond the mind, is to go deeper into being one with Life.

What is the “definition” of a male?
Life will show us that our concept based on physical characteristics is not enough. A “male” could be in the physical body of a female. That is reality. However, our “definition,” our ideal becomes our “law” of what is “right,” what “should be,” even though, it is not real.

Our labels, our definitions, our beliefs rule our Life, rather than the observation of what Life shows us.
We could label homosexuality as “sinful,” a “punishment of God,” etc. for the sake of self-righteousness, but if it IS, it has the right to BE.

Busy in changing what IS, we will reject it. If we were busy in understanding Life, we will see that everything has a timing and change does not happen through the pungent will of one human or one hundred. That can only cause struggle, fight, violence. Anything achieved through violence is short lived and has consequences for the ones causing it.

In the world of duality, if male with female was the “law” of attraction, then in time, all sort of combinations will appear: Female with Female, Male with Male, and finally, gender-less … When there is gender, gender-less is a given. Duality.
Is that hurting our “sensitivity” for conditioned moral standards?

Sexually; gay and straight do not mix together, just like water does not mix with oil. Nevertheless, both can relate in many other ways. We are Human Beings after all.
What is your NATURE is natural to you, but there are so many conditionings surrounding that, traumatizing what is meant to manifest in its unique way.

There is nothing in Life worth as much as knowing who we ARE, but that will not make us rich, famous or powerful.
The conditionings of society will take us to the later, while only very few, will take the former.

The world of DUALITY is “real.” De-conditioning is needed to “comprehend” it.

In life, Dirty and Clean play paradoxically together.

An air conditioner appliance has a filter. The quality of air going through it, depends on the filter.
Likewise, Human beings have a “filter” in their constitution.
If the filter is pretty “clean,” the experience of Life will be different than someone who has a somewhat “dirty” filter. Not “better” but “different.”
“Dirty” means more use. It doesn’t mean “bad.”
A “dirty” filter means the accumulation of the experience of suffering, through the acute consciousness of the “I.” Paradoxically, that is the natural path for “No-I,” a “clean” filter again.

The filter will clean itself, after being completely dirty.
How? Life performs the “magic” through unrehearsed Life experiences, when our time arrives. Dirty and Clean are the range of a full experience in Life.

The experience of sexuality has to deal a lot with that “filter.” Teachers are into techniques, methods, information to make the sexual experience “better” for their followers. There is no consideration of the “filter,” that is the types of experience that one individual is to experience according to his consciousness. 

That game of people with “dirty” and “clean” filters, present an array of experiences in Life for humanity. 
Every experience we experience, is related with someone else’s. We are all connected.

Awareness means to observe the direction that Life is taking us.
Many times, we want to go South, when Life is moving us North. Paradoxically, by going North, we will go eventually, South.
Once we are aware of the game, we will know how to play it, but what we know is only for us. Others have their own path.
In Life, there are no fixed rules. Fixation is merely a perception.

Even tough connected, we are alone. If you believe to be alone, you are missing the connection.

Looking outside the shoe box

The collective consciousness labels and segments experiences: Good, bad, right, wrong. It is all relative to a perspective, a conditioning, a moral standard.
But, the individual experience can only show a limited range. What is a “bad” experience? The passage to a “good” one.
Isn’t “right” born out of what is “wrong”?

Cause and effect are together. All experiences in a person’s life are necessary together. Life is a “togetherness,” although our mind insists in viewing parts and labeling them.
A wall clock is a togetherness. We label 11 AM as “good or bad.” But time never stays fixed; but our labels do.

Sexuality practically, is a range of an experience. Every individual has a particular experience within that range.
The fixation is in achieving some ideal of what “should be.”

“Reality” is that as humans, we ARE not the same…. But we ARE. Language doesn’t allow for that illogical contradiction, but Life is oblivious of our logical constructs. Truly, Life is far from our intellectual understanding, the shoe box.

When we dare to look outside of the shoe box, we will observe that nothing is confined into a container. We make that trick.
The trick works because everyone is conditioned to believe in it.

Watch TV for too long and you will start believing that that world is “real.” It is a dreamy world where the reality of our feelings is confined for the sake of being “right” according to some moral gospel, another shoe box.

Shoes are not meant to be inside shoe boxes.  We believe they should be.

Pretty “spiritual” phrases: Be yourself

“I just need to be myself,” is a  fashionable “spiritual catchphrase.”
Before that, the “teaching” was to BE like someone else. That could have been a saint, a hero, a politician, a priest anyone else deemed to be “good.”

Then conflict arose: “How should I BE myself if I am a [sinner, impure] not worthy? I have to attain what this other person IS, to be worthy!”
Nevertheless, the conditioning of what is “worthy” and the forgetfulness that any so called, “virtue” cannot be attained through a method is apparent; for that virtue is a state of BEING, not a state of DOING. Repetition  of what is perceived to be a “good action” does not make you virtuous, but dull. From society’s viewpoint is “better” to DO something considered “good” even though it is not what is felt, a natural outcome of BEING. For someone in the path of self-realization, to OBSERVE what you ARE at one moment is of paramount importance. BE AWARE of that.

METHODS cannot bring a person to a different state of consciousness.
This confusion, is observed for example, in “spiritual sexuality.”
The collective consciousness of the common man is of an angry monkey, ready to be violent and defensive. The belief is that by “teaching” methods and practices, that monkey could be a great lover!
That is an illusion and so is to repress our sexuality.  DEEPLY OBSERVE what IS first, then  true change is automatic, and not artificial by following commandments, etc.
A person wanting to imitate Gautama Buddha or Jesus, is bound to fail miserably. He can only be a double face, dishonest actor.
Paradoxically, that imitation will only increase his chances to go to “Hell rather than Heaven,” although that is not the objective of the “spiritual”  imitation.

Why is that? Inner dishonesty could pass as honest activity (DOING) under the view of society’s rules, but that farce cannot cheat the rules of Life.

“BE yourself” when viewed in depth, is meaningless.
Who is that “YOU” that you want to BE? It is a made up mental ideal. Our conditioned mind has a form made of parameters delimiting that which we call “I.”

“BE” is the “spiritual phrase.” BEING is not limited by the ideas of “myself” or “yourself.” To BE is unexpected, of the moment. It is not directed by the mind. Most individuals in the civilized world, are unable to BE, because their conditioned minds will not allow for that to happen.
Therefore, to BE means to become AWARE of all those conditioning agents running constantly through our minds. It means to OBSERVE how the mind takes over and directs our personality. Without this previous “work” there cannot be “Just BE.”

Another way to explain the above, is by using the label “emptiness.” It is the process of dissolution of the mind and its conditionings as to leave stillness of the mind. This stillness is out of emptiness and not out of artificial control [“I control my mind.”] Picture a room full of stuff, ready to overflow if the door is left open. Control is necessary in that picture to keep things inside the room. However, if the room is empty, there is ample space to decorate that room with newness of Life.

BE YOURSELF is truly a way to chain our experience to a particular form/belief/idiosyncrasy/upbringing, etc. FREEDOM is not there.

We can experiment with BEING SOMEONE else. There are many methods and religions for that. We can experience with BEING YOURSELF, there are many self-help books written about this topic; but we cannot experiment with BEING.

To BE is freedom. It is freedom from the known. The idea of the collective consciousness about freedom, is infantile.

To grow up means to look, to observe, to be aware without judgment, without mind, so the realization of that experience is able to change our lives. 🙂

The consciousness of Tantra

Jesus of Nazareth (a.k.a Christ) and Mary Magdalene were the embodiment of the consciousness of Tantra. So was Osho.
Who taught them Tantra“techniques”? Who certified them? What master classes did they attend to?

Tantra happens naturally in a particular level of consciousness. As a consequence, Sexuality will have a different meaning.

For a typical person, Tantra is about sex…“slow sex.”
The distortion is evident.
For a “normal” individual, sexual energy is a pleasurable energy that builds up and that excitement at the same time creates the need to get rid of it quickly (sexual relief.) That pleasure cannot be enjoyed for a longer time and “saved.” It needs to be released. Thus, the frenetic physical movements coupled with violence and anger (main energies of the collective consciousness at this time) giving the sensation that “sex is made in fast, feverish movements.”    That may be “true” for the collective consciousness only.

What has been offered to the masses is a “training” to slow down. Copying the ACTION (DOING) does not mean that the consciousness (BEING) is behind it.
The collective consciousness is a “monkey sees, monkey does” type of consciousness. However, a monkey IS still a monkey, no matter what it DOES.

That “monkey” consciousness is the one in search of techniques, methods, rituals, etc. to “look like” the “real thing.”

What I am describing above is not only about Tantra for the collective consciousness, but the whole package of the so called “spirituality.”
“BE like a spirit. It is our “true” nature.”  It is taught.  Translated to a “normal” consciousness it means to deny the body. The follower will deny his own body to pursue an ideal, a mental idea of what “should be.”
This is not “bad,” for there will be learning, although; it may not be a pleasant experience. That is the “tuition” for the lesson.

Therefore, without the previous “work” in consciousness; how could we say that we are “practicing” Tantra?
How is it possible for someone to speak about “self-realization,” by only exploring human sexuality?
That is a mirage.

However, there is a lesson there to be learned.

Ahnanda never thought that he will be sharing about Tantra. A few years ago, that was the furthest from his Life experience. Life is full of surprises!

Tantra happens when the time arrives.
Followers of self-realized individuals have made Tantra into a “method.” Those “methods” were kept secret for centuries, only given in a particular sect, philosophy, religious belief, etc. However, some westerners learned these “secrets” with the hope to “help others.” (Making $$ by selling a new thing in a “new”package. Nothing wrong with that; but those sexual “techniques” are not Tantra.)

Note that, a “higher” consciousness is not a “secret” to be sold. It is something that happens to humans who are ready after having gone through the wheel of Life experiences.

Jesus was crucified. Mary Magdalene is known by the masses as having been a prostitute. She wasn’t. That is a gross misunderstanding. Osho had been in trouble with the “law” and his practice was misunderstood by the collective consciousness.

Interesting outcome. Don’t you think?
The collective consciousness lags behind the pioneers. Only few human beings are ready at a particular point in time. Those individuals will be misunderstood while alive, but once the collective consciousness changes in time, all of the sudden; the words of the “misunderstood” will become “best sellers” and even “holy books.” We will have statues and pictures of the previously misunderstood “avatars” and the space to worship them.

Alive they were a “problem.” Dead,  they are revered.