Patience: The art of waiting
A desire, a goal, an objective will always be in the future.
Patience lives in that gap between the “now” and that future.
A desire, a goal, an objective may be attained or may not.
We could live with the belief that we will do. There is no attainment that could bring inner fulfillment.
“Success” is the word we use when we attain something.
“Failure” is the word we use when we cannot attain.
Patience is the common ground where Inner fulfillment is found.
Have you experienced what is like to patiently wait?
If you “do it right,” you will not feel the time as “wasted.”
Don’t like to wait?
Then do not have a goal, an objective, a desire to attain.
When there is no failure, there is no success; thus, patience only remains.
Wait! That is it. Wait a minute, a second… How long can you wait?
Why do we feel tired of waiting?
Because of the need to attain.
It is “bad” to have an objective or a goal?
NO! As long as you are willing to play the game. Objectives bring time, and time brings the “future,” the waiting game.
Without objectives or goals or desires, what could we DO in Life?
Easy. We could live Life.
Can we live without goals? or should we patiently wait until we can?
Patience: Hallowed be thy name…
Plenty of Time
When we get out of the world of the mind, we will see things differently, thus our experience will be different.
Intellectual understanding of “spirituality” is pointless, although necessary in our process. It is a way of flushing the mind from stale information.
When was the last time you went to the Ocean? How often do you allow yourself to enjoy it?
That is what is Natural. In that world there is no need to intellectually understand anything. You are there, you are part of it. Become absorbed, Be the Ocean… If you are looking to intellectually understand this, you will not.
In that state of absorption, the “office world” is over. The “problem” at home is non-existent. Your Life as a “soap opera,” with the emotional highs and lows, is discontinued.
All you have to “DO” is not to think about it.
Why is that so hard? Why the thoughts continue to arrive despite our strong willingness not to think about those issues?
The “I” fighting to overcome his own thoughts is an illusion and so any “effort” not to think.
Just become absorbed in the enjoyment of Nature. That is all. If the “I” is separated, there is a fight.
But… you don’t have time for these things… Have places to go and things to accomplish, here or for the after Life.
Who has time to enjoy Nature, when there are so many things to accomplish?
That person is not ready for depth.
A busy person is not ready to move forward “spiritually,” for he does not have time for himself.
When you are ready to BE different, you will have plenty of time.
Ah! It will not be “your” decision. Life will put you there when your time arrives. In the meantime, enjoy being busy! 🙂
Facing to heal
When the “I” is hurt through an experience, there could be revenge or there could be surrendering as a reaction. Either way, the “I” cannot let go or move on, for the pain will not allow it.
When a person speaks of the need for emotional or psychological healing, that person is describing a traumatic experience, which wasn’t allowed to dissolve through the full process.
That experience could come from many lives before, but the pain will be triggered through different experiences in our current life.
A person who lacks awareness will only point a finger onto the culprit of his woes, or try to get rid of the “source” of his pain, or even become submissive of a greater force than himself.
All of those reactions are merely there to reject the experience.
To be submissive is to reject our own self worth.
Suzie had issues with her mother from an early age. Her mother was very bossy, thinking that she was right all the time. Suzie couldn’t express herself well. She would keep an experience that she perceived as unjust towards her, in her heart… the “unconscious.”
Suzie developed problems with her digestion which had a psychological origin; however, doctors kept medicating her for a physical problem. Life continued on and those resentments surfaced in Suzie. As the mother became older, she wasn’t the same. Life taught her to tone down, she became almost like a child, but Suzie’s resentment and anger were unleashed towards her mother. “Time to get even,” Suzie thought.
Suzie left the house and she swore never to see her mother again after all the things that she had done to her…
“Time will heal,” we say; but it doesn’t.
Time only covers the wounds.
Those wounds will be open again at some other time.
When the “I” suffers from an experience; there may be a need for “time off.”
That is the time to recuperate and build ourselves up.
General wisdom will advice: “ Move on, forget the past.”
The trauma cannot be forgotten, it will resurface until we realize that we need to face the issue.
“The issues are in the tissues,” and they will resurface as long as fear and our inability to face things is not realized.
Suzie may have the space to recuperate. She may have the space to fill herself with peace, but unless she realizes her attraction towards violence as away to punish herself, she will continually look for violence towards her being: Self-inflicted or not.
Her mother was the trigger and the source to give the opportunity for Suzie to heal.
Why does Suzie punish herself?
There is guilt in her. That guilt needs to be dissolved. The typical word used is “forgiven.”
Suzie may not see it as it is easier to blame the obvious: “Her mother is a witch.” Yes, her mother has her own issues to deal with, but in a household of 3 kids, only one of them was affected as much as Suzie did. In Life, nothing is a random event. The web of interactions is exactly as it needs to be.
We could easily say: “That is Suzie’s karma” but that does not bring any solution to her woes. “You acted wrong in another Life, now you have to pay for it.”
That is a story for little children.
We may need to deal with what is “now” and Life will bring the tools and resources to do it, if we are ready; if the “I” will allow it by not holding onto beliefs, but by having the courage to face the truth as it changes, as it unfolds…
If that emotion is “let go,” then the time to move on has arrived.
The proof that the issue is gone is in Suzie’s interaction with her mother and not in running away and using the “spiritual buzzwords” of “letting go and moving on.”
Therefore, it is in the moment when Suzie faces her mother empty of that guilt, when she will know if she is healed from previous traumatic experiences.
Please keep this in your awareness: Every experience in Life only will show us who we are. Nothing wrong with that. Just become aware of it.
When Suzie is empty of that inner-guilt, there is no outside violence, which will be a magnet for her.
“When do we move on and let go, then?”
When there is no space in us for that type of wound to appear.
When Suzie has dealt with her guilt and she is able to feel appreciation and compassion for her mother, then she could move on and let go of the past and that will be without effort, it will be as natural as watching a rainy day from the comfort of our home.
We could see the beauty, the uniqueness… but we will not get soaking wet.
“Love” will then have a different dimension in Suzie’s heart.
She is healed. 🙂
To feel Life: The new medicine. No side effects.
When Ananda wakes up early in the morning, he will sit down outside by the balcony of his room.
Opening the arms by his lap, feeling that energy flowing in his hands… that energy is who I am. It is the energy of the Universe itself.
Not the label “Ananda,” nor the body sitting there but that energy flowing alive which also manifests through my breathing and feeling.
When thoughts appear one by one, they are observed as if watching a movie from a distance and magically, they go away…
It is about feeling gratitude to life. That feeling keeps itself alive as it mingles in unison with my breathing… Thoughts are no longer; but a feeling of “Thank you,” and a smile will naturally appear.
Gratitude without words.
Then, my hands will move slowly as in a Tai chi dance, flowing into harmonious forms while breathing. It seems as if I knew that “slow dance” from before.
That experience has no timing and no name. No clocks are needed or special effects. It lasts as long as it “feels good.” The location is always Nature.
That practice revitalizes.
When thinking is no longer needed, then we could observe “inside.”
Nothing to think about. Nothing to worry about. Nothing to do. Nothing to desire. Just to be there and enjoy that moment, to be aware of that instant, to feel gratitude for that chance.
That is all. That is to live life.
No beliefs required. No guilt about wasting time or to be compelled to do something “useful” with time.
There, there is no time to kill.
It is “you” feeling the timelessness of “you.” Even for a second.
Second by second is how a new consciousness appears.
No rush. When there is no time, paradoxically; we have all the time.
Nothing “good” to learn today, huh?
There is no need to learn. No need to be “good.” It is already there, and it will manifest if allowed to.
Don’t you believe me? Too “good” to be true?
Believe in what you would. Think a lot about it. Read more. Consult with the “experts.”Follow the “right steps”…
Let me share a secret: It is not what you “do” but what you allow to happen.
Life itself is knocking at the door and when you decide to open is when the adventure starts.
Triumph is not just a moment in time
Today was the ceremony when Dacio (Raysha and Ananda’s father) was going to be part of the Totality.
He had a unique name, just as his life was.
Ananda was representing that transformation through physical means: He took a piece of bread representing matter and started diluting his own ego. He placed that piece of bread into a glass a water which was representing the subtle energies.
Hard matter becomes soft through subtle energies, just as a human being who has harsh manners becomes soft and pliable through subtle energies which are placed into the fire of life experiences.
Ananda took the glass and placed it in top of the flame.
Mathias; the wise tree, was directing the ceremony while Raysha was able to see “live” what was happening to her father in that region of light known as a “parallel world.”
Mathias: “ The once separated consciousness of the observer and the object observed no longer separates and observes but then only feels. The next transformation is to become light only to be empty and from that essence back into the Totality, the Universal intelligence. That experience is the triumph of living life.”
Ananda took the glass with water and soggy bread and drank it, representing the process of once separated things, become one into the Totality.
Raysha observed how her father was speaking with what appeared to be his ancestors during that ceremony. They told him that this is the ceremony of complete dissolution of the “I.”
Dacio lied down in what appeared to be a rock. He looked at Raysha and told her: “Thank you for everything. You promised me that you were going to be with me until the end. I promise you that I will be with you when you need me.”
Saying that, the ancestors gathered together around Dacio and raised their arms… when they dropped their arms; Dacio in his body of light was no longer there.
Mathias finished the ceremony while the ancestors left the “place.”
Mathias: “Raysha… I want to speak with you. Do you have anything that you want to say?”
Raysha: “No, Mathias. I don’t want to say anything but Thank you.”
Mathias: “What about you Ananda?”
Ananda:” Well… I wish I could have seen what was happening, but perhaps a little explanation will help me understand. Friend, Is the process to transform from physical matter into light and then back to a physical reality?”
Mathias: “From the physical to light then into the essence in emptiness which will go back to the Totality as one. Empty to be full again… and then empty to be full again.”
Ananda:” What about the ancestors that were there.. They did not go through that transformation?”
Mathias: ” They did. But once you “were” you always will be that.”
Ananda: “That is because there is no time “there.””
Mathias: “What is “there” or “here”?”
Ananda: “The manifestation of that scene.”
Mathias: “There is time because you have to go to work in a few hours, but there is no time as well, it doesn’t exist.”
Ananda: “If I look at something beautiful and then I become it, becoming one.. why that does not happen when I look at some human misery; which we could call ugly?
Mathias: “ Our essence is that beauty. If you reject or judge that which you call ugly or bad; you get trapped in it. “
Ananda: “To reject something is to become it. I don’t understand that very well…”
Mathias: “Ananda has understood already. That which is trying to understand intellectually, is not Ananda.”
Ananda: “Has this experience finished for Dacio?”
Mathias: “This experience of triumph of your father is not just a moment in time.”
Experiences are unique. Experiences are needed to transform. Those experiences cannot be put into words as to explain to another, for that explanation is not the experience which is necessary to transform. It has to be lived, second by second.
Every human being has his own experiences and the words that he uses to explain those…. are limited by his own experience with words and limited language.
Explanations are good for the mind. Experiences are for the hearts to change.
So here is the “teaching.” 🙂
Embrace life as it is, be thankful and appreciative of what is; for that and nothing else is what is supposed to be.
No need to worry about it. It is just Perfect.
Paraphrasing “Depeche Mode’s” song: “Did not tell you anything you didn’t know when you woke up today…” 🙂
Living with concepts, logic and ideas
The conversation below was prompted by the article “What is the point of living?” Sharing that conversation here, may bring some value for some.
Robert: You said “Any “Life teaching” is just theory until someone has experienced that teaching in his life. Then he can understand the teaching and verbalize it.” How do you know then that there is “no death” and that everything you mentioned is eternal? How do you know there isn’t a deity or deities that will exact punishment on those that did not show obedience to him/her/them and by not performing good deeds? Those are not concepts I personally buy into, but who knows? Certainly this doesn’t come from your own experience. It seems that your “I” is biased against certain religious beliefs, that there is something “wrong” in the way certain people live their lives and what they believe. In your words “However, that individual does not realize about his own immortality. That individual is unwilling to trust life and the experiences in it when is trapped in duality and the belief that “this is good and that is bad.” To me, that statement smacks of ego and duality. In fact the whole premise of non-dualism versus dualism seems to be unable to escape the latter, not unlike the desire to extinguish desire. All that being said, this whole messy thing called life is both wonderfully and tragically absurd to me. Thanks for your posts. They help me question the stories and concepts that I tell myself and hear from others. Peace out! 🙂
As an aside, living with the fear of death at any moment is very different than living with the awareness of death at any moment, which is a somewhat common spiritual practice in the East. The latter leads to a greater appreciation of life in the moment and a deeper understanding and acceptance of impermanence. One can realize more gratitude for every in breath and is less likely to take take “time” for granted.
Ananda: That “knowing” is not intellectual information, which requires logical, reasonable premises with scientific evidence.
Nevertheless, let me be “intellectual.” Let me use intellectual logic to answer your question.
The first law of thermodynamics “matter cannot be created neither destroyed, only transforms” may give an intellectual clue. If matter is not created, where Deities, God and so on come into the picture of creation? If matter cannot be destroyed, then what is the fear of those who could destroy it?
When we talk about consciousness, who has created consciousness? Isn’t consciousness already there and manifested through beings in a physical form?
Eternity deals with time. Logically, there cannot be a “beginning of time.” For then, we will need to find a “creator” and then who created that creator? This is the “chicken or the egg” paradox, which I had the chance to write about back in 2007 when I was enjoying the intellectual consciousness.
In the novel “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows,” Luna Lovegood answers a question regarding the chicken or the egg by stating that “a circle has no beginning.”
That is known as cyclical time, which originates the concept of “eternal return.”
How do I know practically that the intellectual, informational stuff above is true?
By my own experience, of course.
I have experienced “fortune telling.”
I have experienced several times when someone has told me exactly what is going to happen in my “future.” One of those is my sister who has that gift.
How does she know about my future if I have not “done” it yet?
Some intellectual answers: Maybe she influenced me psychologically so I made that reality to be mine. Isn’t that logical? But when it is about relatives passing away or events not related with me personally, then I’d better find another “reasonable” explanation.
How about the devil telling her things? How about a deity punishing those people for their “bad” deeds? It is possible.
However, when I understand logically from all the stuff shared above that “my past is my future and my future my past,” then I could see how time is relative to a point of reference (the “I”) and how what we perceive as life is truly a movie which paradoxically “has been made” but it is being made “now” at the same time.
That is not logical. It is a paradox. Some may not be able to understand paradoxes for our educational system does not teach that but only logic.
The above is what some call predestination. We are part of that “movie” as individuals but as a Totality as well. Both at the same time.
I have other experiences confirming this, but obviously those who have in their experience the ability to remember previous lifetimes, cannot deny that experience for the sake of being “reasonable.”
Death is in our experience already, but most don’t remember it.
Anne mentioned in the last thread: “A while back, I had an amazing experience. I was sitting outside and the wind blew and these tiny flowers on a tree started falling like snow. It was so beautiful, I was enjoying the moment and All of a sudden time stopped and I became a part of everything…I was the wind, I was the flowers falling, and the tree…the whole universe.”
Isn’t that an experience which confirms that we may not only be that “I” which we perceive to be?
Isn’t that “I” the one who experiences death? But how it could be… if everything recycles, because nothing can be destroyed neither created?
Finally, there is “nothing wrong” in the way people perceive life. It is their perception, but I am sharing here “mine.”
Our language is dualistic and comparisons are unavoidable when trying to explain something.
Robert: To me, that statement smacks of ego and duality. In fact the whole premise of non-dualism versus dualism seems to be unable to escape the latter, not unlike the desire to extinguish desire.”
Ananda: “duality vs. non-duality” isn’t that perception duality?
What I am sharing here is not “non-duality” neither duality. It is easy to label these things to say : Ahhh! this is Taoism or Zen or Buddhism, or other thing… but I do not represent any religious beliefs or philosophical currents.
I am just sharing my experiences based on my consciousness that is all.
Robert: Reading your stuff and hearing your sharing feels a bit how I was when I first started reading Alan Watts. It was hard for me to understand. after letting things sit for a few years I found his book “The Wisdom of Insecurity” which I found to be very powerful, especially his statement that experience, I, and the present moment are all the same. So now I feel like I am a manifestation of the moment as is everything that exists. Hard to articulate but I’m feeling it. My understanding is that predestination is a religious term-there is even double pre-destination. This effects who gets to heaven and who doesn’t I believe, depending on the writer and denomination. To me, spirituality is a stripping away of the unnecessary, the stories, concepts, and labels that are “real but not true (Tara Brach)” and those that no longer serve us. Still, I’ve spent years delving into different notions of spirituality and spiritual worldviews. The result is I’ve had my head in the clouds trying to figure things out that I cannot. I need to be back on solid ground where I can relate to more practical (for me) rather than esoteric (to me) practices for living my life with equanimity, serenity, and love. The Stoics, I think are a good way to go.
Ananda: … That is Alan Watts’ way of saying “Totality.” “Oneness,” “we are all one,” or “I am the world, the world is I,” “interbeingness,” “we are all God,” etc. Note that any of the above “catch phrases” could be grossly misinterpreted by those who do not have the experience but just intellectual understanding. Generalizing, that is how a religion appears.
Predestination is just another concept, just like Heaven, sin, etc. When a religion makes a dogma out of an experience labeled with a concept, duality is brought and with that many misunderstandings. When we discover that we are not concepts, because “we are the now and the experience,” then those concepts are automatically and painlessly dropped.
To me “spirituality” is just another label which I don’t want to make a religion of. What matters to me is to live life with joy, to enjoy life… because if “I” am the “now”, and the experience; then… let that be a joyful “me.”
Anne: I had a near death experience in my 20’s which at the time I did not understand, but have had many years to process and think about it. I realize now that I feel fortunate to have had the experience and a “knowing” of what is is like on the other side. To know that we are consciousness and our soul is just in the earth suit (body) while we are here. When we die the soul leaves the body and returns to source, which I call God. We can call it (God) many different things but it is what it is…all being… All knowing…omnipresent and most importantly, unconditional love.
God welcomes you home, he…it…whatever, certainly does not want us to live by a set of rules to be “good” and “accepted”. And God certainly doesn’t punish anyone for anything. It doesn’t matter if you are baptized, not baptized or if you stand on your head…or do things that are unloving to any degree…God is love, unconditional love…he will welcome you home and based on my experience, he will ask you what you’ve learned. I believe we are here to learn, give and experience unconditional love.
I had a vision of my son 7 years before he was born. A flash of a picture of him at about 1 year old came to my mind. I didn’t know his name. I didn’t know when, where or how he would come, but I knew like I know my name and in the depth of my soul, he was my son. I KNEW I would have a son.
I have often wondered…how did I see him when he didn’t exist yet… I don’t have an answer. But I guess it goes with the all time is happening at once, past, present, future theory…”
Ananda: Many times confusion arises with so many “keywords.”
Consciousness, soul, God, body, me, I, omnipresent…
Reason says: If “I am a soul” how can “I” be omnipresent?
The paradox is that we are both the individual and the totality and all the concepts… Consciousness, soul, God, body, me, I, omnipresent.
Who am I? That is not the right question for we cannot define ourselves.
The question could be: What I am not?
Better yet, if there are no questions..
Concepts…. When in our deathbed, all that intellectual stuff will not do a thing to liberate us from fear or uncertainty. Do we know why?
That is what we will find out while living life in our own experiences. As Socrates mentioned: “to live is a preparation to die… “ and I should add that death is a preparation to live.
When you saw your son before he was born, you could have labeled that as a “miracle” but you didn’t… That could have been an “upgraded” label.
To confuse matters, we may say that time “is an illusion” intellectually we have created time, through our thinking.
Thus, time exists for our consciousness is entangled in the changes of matter by using the “I” as a referential point; or paradoxically, we could boldly affirm that time does not exist… it is an illusion.
Logically, we can say; but If time exists how is it possible for time not to exist?
Then I could affirm: Drop your logic. Throw it away and perhaps we could see something different from a different perspective.
It just happened that you were able to see what you had done before. Did you fast-forward the movie of life? No. It just happened.
Everything just happens when it needs to happen. There is no need for an “I” to do anything. The “I’ could do, but in that doing, duality will be experienced. The “I” searches for pleasure and because of that, the “I” finds sorrow. That is why some religions have ascetic practices avoiding pleasure, believing that pleasure is “bad.” Nevertheless, the “I” is the “culprit” coloring the experience.
Is that bad?
No. It just happens…
Life is a game. Some people think that they “lose the game” and others win and that turns around… but at the end, everyone is just playing a game.
Awareness may be just to see with appreciation this game called “Monopoly” with many players and many incidents that could happen while going around the board of life… and if it is a game, we may as well enjoy it !
Anne: You are really deep!
What do you mean we can’t define ourselves? or is the question defining ourselves to whom?
I can say Anne – you know…she lives in the USA, loves music, they call her peace-child….etc. or explain things about me, my experience that are unique to me and my life as opposed to anyone else, then you would know I was talking about Anne.
You said, “better yet if there are no questions.”
What? Its human nature to question…Our brains are wired for it.
But I guess I am more peaceful when I don’t question. Acceptance is a beautiful thing.
Ananda: The question defines the answer.
You said about me: “You are really deep!”
That is a definition, but in that definition in your mind; you don’t allow me to be shallow… and I am very shallow as well… For the mind, to be shallow and deep at the same time is “illogical,” unreasonable non- scientifical nonsense.
I am shallow, I am deep, I am fear, I am love, I am all the opposites at the same time and with the same intensity.
What I am not?
If I define something such as life or anything else, we could see that I am basically shutting down in my mind the opportunity for life or anything else to be different, to change… and life… changes.
Therefore, we could see the limitation of language, concepts and verbalized ideas, however; If I want to convey something using words, I must bear with that shortcoming. (that is why no scripture could be the whole truth.)
Whatever we think life is… is limiting, thus it is not the complete truth… but a static concept, a static thought and when we live with concepts we do not allow ourselves to experience the changes of life, but life is conceptually caged in a comfortable space in our heads.
But, didn’t I say that life is a game? Wasn’t that a definition?
Logically, Yes and No.
When thinking is not the driving force for knowing about life, then we can contemplate life and the answers will arrive without asking “logical” questions, the experience of being peaceful and not intellectual knowledge is what we look for at the end of the day… and there are not “this is the only way” paths for that is to be closed to what life could offer 🙂
The “now” does not exist
“Be in the now.” “Be in the present.”
Those words are trying to explain the experience of “being centered,” that is when the mind is “timeless.”
The “now” is timeless.
Ananda was looking at the Sun just appearing in the horizon. The beauty of a new day was in front on him. Ananda was touched by the experience and thought: “I am enjoying the present, the now.”
Actually, he wasn’t. He just thought that he did. 🙂
Every time thinking appears, then time will appear.
That is known as experiencing the “3 aspects of time.”
In a collective consciousness of individuality, there is a past, a present and a future. Our minds are seldom located in the present, because it cannot be grasped. However, the past is easily grasped when we have the time to “rewind our experiences.” On the same token, we could fantasize with the future. That is how a typical human being uses its idle time, when he is not busy.
That fantasy world of past and future will bring emotions and attitudes. The interesting thing to realize is that both, past and future are non-existent.
“I experienced this before.”
Wrong. It was experienced but it wasn’t the “you” who is there “right now.”
There is no single moment which we can call “now.” We are always becoming. We are not the same at any moment unless, we want to create a prototype in our minds as to “who I am” and “how I behave.”
That type of mental jail will not allow us to open up to life and to new experiences.
We are becoming all the time. There is no destination. Our thoughts provide an artificial world of separation which brings the idea of time.
What is the practical aspect of this realization?
If we have any grudges due to some past experience, we are just taking that heavy weight with us when we try to make alive something, which is gone and that is the memory of a person or persons which do not exist anymore. This is how we sabotage our “present” by bringing that past to fit into a different being: “we” in the “now.”
Notice how when we identify ourselves with our “past self” we make that past alive.
Do we understand that everything changes?
But not practically, because in our minds we still bring the “3 aspects of time.”
The above is very important if we are willing to become free from “our” past. If we just understand that those experiences were experienced by a different being which is not the one living today.
Nevertheless, even though we could understand that nothing is the same, we make that past alive and fantasize about the future.
If there is a psychological past and future, then there is a “now” which cannot be grasped by the mind. The present.
To be timeless is to enter in the realm of the immortals. To be timeless is to experience Totality, which has another name in the consciousness of individuality: Soul consciousness.