Tagged: woman

Question about Tantra

“… I too am happy to see you back again… but i have a question. 🙂
Tantra (in India) means something else than what you have explained in your blog. In brief, Tantra means – 1. a Hindu or Buddhist mystical or magical text, dating from the 7th century or earlier. 2. adherence to the doctrines or principles of the tantras, involving mantras, meditation, yoga, and ritual.
It sounds ‘logical’ when you explain that we spontaneously shift from one extreme to the other with passing of time… but where is the need to label it as Tantra which has totally a different meaning? If you are very particular on labeling this process, please choose a different word. And if needed, i can supply you a few words for a nominal fee. 🙂

Thank you for your welcoming message. I will answer your question for I feel, it is for the common good.

When we are speaking about “spiritual matters,” definitions are useful as long as they will give someone an idea of what I am trying to convey. My definition is not the “thing.” If someone gets caught up in my definition, that becomes a belief for that person; for it is second hand stuff taken as a conceptual “truth” or “falsehood.” It does not matter which one. The important thing is that without experience, words are merely incomplete tools.

Tantra is not in your experience yet. For you it is second hand “knowledge,” a concept that you accepted from Wikipedia, a dictionary, a Guru…that is why you are bringing up the tradition, the dictionary definition of what is known by the masses.
In the West, Tantra is understood to be just about sex. “Tantra yoga” is called in the West.
The link below has another explanation of Tantra by a Guru from India:

As you can see, it doesn’t fit your idea or definition of what Tantra is.

And here, a comment by Rajneesh (Osho) from India, about Tantra: “Tantra is science, tantra is not philosophy. To understand philosophy is easy because only your intellect is required. If you can understand language, if you can understand concept, you can understand philosophy. You need not change; you require no transformation. As you are, you can understand philosophy – but not tantra. You will need a change… rather, a mutation. Unless YOU are different tantra cannot be understood, because tantra is not an intellectual proposition, it is an experience. Unless you are receptive, ready, vulnerable to the experience, it is not going to come to you.”

Ahnanda will not give you definitions or commentaries. In my experience Tantra is neither philosophy nor Science. You will find out what Tantra is when you are ready, but I agree with the comment that: “Unless YOU are different, Tantra cannot be understood.”

I picked the word Tantra because it means so many different things for many people, which are the opposite of what I know or have experienced as Yoga, just to make a point.

It seems that you may be biased towards Tantra.  But for you, it is just a word and you have beliefs about that word. The experience is not the word.

Let me go into the importance of understanding how words, concepts, moral standards and ideologies are limiting and how we may need to put our beliefs aside.
The “swastika” in the West means Evil. In India, it means auspiciousness.
The swastika is just a symbol. Is that symbol “evil” or “good”? It just depends where you are, the circumstances, timing, the setting, what your mind already has as “knowledge.”

Another example: A Woman  being “topless” in a beach, could be looked upon as sinful, immoral… in India. Even though India has so many temples depicting bare breasted women engaging in sexual activity. A Temple is probably the most sacred place for the general Indian mentality, but at the same time sex may be considered as a “taboo” in most Indian Culture.
Isn’t that contradictory? In the USA there are beaches where it is “legal” for women to be topless. At other beaches it is “illegal.” In the USA morality becomes an imaginary line between what is “legal,” and “illegal.” It is not a religious thing anymore.  At many beaches in Europe, it is alright for women to be topless in a beach. We could appreciate the different perspectives, knowing that everyone has a different viewpoint. This is not a matter of being “right or wrong.”
See my point? It is in your openness to an experience how the “taboo” gets dissolved and we become free from the “hang up.” There is no rejection of any viewpoint, but acceptance of all.

Tantra is like that. It has the ability to dissolve “hang ups,” “taboos” through acceptance.

The same woman could go to different beaches around the world and that woman will not have a “hang up” about her breasts being exposed, but she will behave according to the situation and understand that the “sin” is not in her bare breasts being exposed, but in the eyes of those looking at her with disrespect. 

Your attitude is what determines your openness in Life.

All the best to you! 🙂

On Man and Woman


Possibly this is the duality which most could be familiar with, because we are living this duality throughout our lives. From this understanding based on experience and not on a conceptual definition, we could understand dualistic thinking.

Are there any differences between man and woman? This question already has set up dualism in it, so the answer could be dualistic: Yes or No. This is the type of answer sought by talk shows to create polemical debates.

When we look at someone without those labels which only create differences between human beings, we are a step forward. It is true that from the majority, their view on someone will be dualistic: “You are this. I am that. There is a difference. I will treat you and perceive you based on that difference.” However, their view on you should not affect what you feel about them. This is to live in the reality of “now” and not in a conceptual world of yesterday, made by artificial traditions, beliefs and such.

There is no difference between man and woman, but there is. Can we live with that? Man and Woman are human beings with complementary energies. That is all. Just as day and night.

That energy is not related with the way the body looks or functions. That is why there is homosexuality and in that realm, there is still male energy and female energy.

That variety of complementary energies is shown in animals and plants: There is asexuality, homosexuality, bisexuality, etc. There is a range.

Similarly is with human beings. What is the sense on labeling that variety as “good or bad” if it is the way it is?
Acceptance of what is will give us the openness to feel oneness. Rejection of what is based on “moral” codes, beliefs, traditions, etc. will surely destroy our possibility to perceive totality, wholesomeness and harmonious balance.

When there is a magnet with a positive polarity near a magnet with negative polarity, there will be a strong attraction of those 2 magnets. That force of attraction will make those 2 magnets crash with a force which is proportional to their magnetic,”attractive” intensity.

The same is with human beings. Many will “hit” one another and find out later the consequences of it.

When a human being, has not explored the male and female side in them, there will be a tremendous neediness for the other side. Their “opposite side.” Everyone is looking to be complete. That completeness comes according to their own nature. Thus, it is important to explore in ourselves and find out what is our nature, our role in life.
For some, it may be to live with a partner, for others there is no need for it, and yet others may find anything in between.

Different needs, Different nature. There is variety.

Please see the importance of first balancing our own polarity within ourselves to be become wholesome within ourselves. Then this wholesomeness could be shared in relationship, thus making a greater unity.

However, in reality this rarely will happen, because there is no such inner observation.

If our polarity is strong in one side, we will search without doubt to find our other “half.” That search could be detrimental when neediness is the instigator of that search.

This is why, some religions advocate the complete separation between male and female energies as a way to find God. Please be aware, that this is just a tool to reform the self which needs to find their other half within themselves first, to become a complete unity by balancing inner energies. Nevertheless, when this method is not understood, there will be rejection towards the other side. With that rejection will come an inner fight, for the need to meet our other “half” will be there.

No matter what we do or think. We cannot lie to ourselves for too long.

A person suppressing his “natural” need for the pursue of an ideal, will experience many inner fights of emotional nature until that need is either expressed (which will happen as an emotional explosion due to repressing ) or that repressed energy will end our well-being through an emotional, psychological or physical disease.

On the contrary, those who have not found their own unity, even though they may find a partner in their lives; will experience the sensation that something is missing. This could translate in a continuous search and disappointments, for there is no one who can give us something that we do not have.

That is the mirage.

When that unity is found within the self, which expresses as being self-sufficient, self-reliant and having self-respect out of acceptance of all, and not out of rejection of all, then that person is ready to expand that self into a “bigger” self, that is a relationship. In that experience of unity beyond the boundaries of the self, is when the male and female energies are complementary of each other.

In the realm of metaphysical “new age,” there is the talk about “soul mates” and also about “twin flames.”
A “soul mate” being any relationship which had a strong influence in our many lives, which is the product of karma. On the other hand, the “twin flame” is depicted as that relationship where harmonious “unity” is felt. It is said to be the first relationship someone had as a couple in their first incarnation, which later on due to karmic accounts, that relationship had a gap of many lifetimes without that “other half.”

It is also mentioned, that for this meeting to happen again, those karmic bondages which initiated that separation need to be clear. Thus, a relationship with a “twin flame” is something that could only occur when there has been spiritual work which will allow that full recognition. The purpose of a “twin flame” relationship is not to experience romantic love, but to experience unconditional healing love that will allow further spiritual progress and to radiate that expression onto other human beings.

Here a link to recognize a “false twin-flame.” 🙂

The above belief could have some “truth” in it. However, the main point is that without that inner work to find unity within the self, there is not a chance to experience anything further. The “normal” realm is all there is then and that realm comes with all the “normal” problems and issues that we hear about all the time.

A Divine relationship is not made on Earth for self fulfillment, but it is made in “Heaven,” as an aid to progress on the spiritual path, for in that state of consciousness, unity is all there is.

Reader Remark: Woman’s equality with Man – A perspective

Om Shanti brother,
I read today a very interesting article on woman’s equality with men. A very simple, yet highly scholarly article! It clearly explains how the Bible was distorted to project the supposed inferiority of woman, yet it restores hidden concepts from the Bible itself to show woman is equal to man. This will make easier BKs’ effort to help those from the Christian background. Interestingly it is written by a male, that too from Hindu background! Really a must-read! Here is the link:


Dear soul,
Thank you for sharing that link. The fight between genders have been an ongoing thing since the perception of “being different” appeared. Humanity is always dividing. Races, countries, religions, etc. Everything is a division. That only accumulates further ego.

Men and Women express 2 different energies of the same unity. They are complementary as the Yin and Yang.
Then we have the “stereotypes” which make a woman do certain things or be certain things. That probably was true sometime ago in many countries; but as we should be aware; the gap is closing and women are doing the same things than men and even opportunities are changing even though it could be argued that it is a “male” world.

Hence, the need of female energy to balance that male dominated world.

However, “female energy” does not necessarily mean being in a female body; but to have the stereotypical qualities of female energies such as: nurturing care, sensitivity, and sustenance towards others. Those are female energy qualities, which could be held by men as well.

As it is in the world, when in “body consciousness,” we either tend to believe that God has chosen man or woman (according to a religion) as their “favorite” gender to “save” the world… 🙂 thus, we build hierarchies based upon that belief.

That denotes lack of spiritual understanding.

Best wishes!